1. < Bone Marrow Transplant (BMT) & CAR-T Cell Therapy

HELP! Caring for husband with Bone Marrow Transplant & young son

Posted by mrspix1975 @mrspix1975, Jan 26 1:36pm

Hello everyone
Has anyone had to temporarily move to a different state for bone marrow transplant? My husband , my son and I did just that. Now my husband is out of the hospital going to his meetings 2x wk . And I am his caregiver, also I care for our 5 yr old boy. Who’s going to kinder. Is been an emotional rollacoaster for all. My husband wants me to take our son from school fearing for any sort of virus/ bacteria transmission from our sons . Our son Loves kinder , and he is an only child . I don’t know what to do . Anyone out here that might have encounter this situation? Thank you very much

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Mentor
Lori, Volunteer Mentor | @loribmt | Jan 26 11:23pm

Welcome to Connect, @mrspix1975 I’m so glad you reached out! Most all of us who have received a bone marrow transplant were required to relocate for many months for the procedure and recovery. We can relate to what you’re going through! And you’re so right, it is an emotional roller coaster for your entire family. I think it’s especially challenging and overwhelming for the caregiver…which is you! You’re responsible for holding the family together while taking care of your husband and little son. That isn’t easy when you’re so far from home!
But you made it through that first hurdle and now everyone is back home and you’re striving for some sense of normalcy. Unfortunately life isn’t quite back to normal yet. For a while there is still the balancing act of getting your husband to appointments, taking care of what used to be his workload at home and also taking care of your little boy’s needs.

I’m sure your son is excited to be back in school with his friends. As a transplant patient myself, I also understand your husband’s concern about trying to keep the home environment free from potential health risks while he’s early in his transplant. He is very vulnerable to illnesses and infections right now so he isn’t comfortable with the possibility of your son bringing germs home from school. Kids are germ bombs. ☺️

When I had my transplant I was already much older with no little children around. It was also before Covid. So I wanted to get a better perspective of life with children before I answered your posting. I spoke with a young father tonight, who recently had his transplant and has 2 children age 5 and under.

My friend suggested two things. First, the best people to ask would be your husband’s transplant team. They know your husband’s health situation, how well he’s recovering and if his blood numbers are returning to normal. His immune system is highly compromised right now. His team may have some good suggestions on how to balance home life with young children in the house.

The 2nd suggestion is to have your son take a short leave of absence from school temporarily until the worst of the cold and flu season is over. Could you consider that as a possibility? Are there workbooks and projects that your son could work on so that he wouldn’t be behind in school?

I know you have so much on your plate right now to manage. Is there a family member who can help you out from time to time? When was your husband’s transplant?

REPLY
1 reply
royce | @royce | Jan 27 6:43am

I understand your husband's concerns. A week before my wife's surgery for ovarian cancer, our grandson and daughter visited us. Our grandson was coughing during the visit. Both my wife and I got some kind of viral infection. My wife's surgery had to be postponed. Luckily, everything went well with the surgery, she's been through the first chemo therapy and is on the maintenance chemo now. We have not visited or had a visit from grandkids since then. Our grandkids get sick after going to day care and school all during the flu/COVID season.

REPLY
1 reply
mrspix1975 | @mrspix1975 | Jan 27 11:00am
In reply to @loribmt "Welcome to Connect, @mrspix1975 I’m so glad you reached out! Most all of us who have..." + (show)
@loribmt

Welcome to Connect, @mrspix1975 I’m so glad you reached out! Most all of us who have received a bone marrow transplant were required to relocate for many months for the procedure and recovery. We can relate to what you’re going through! And you’re so right, it is an emotional roller coaster for your entire family. I think it’s especially challenging and overwhelming for the caregiver…which is you! You’re responsible for holding the family together while taking care of your husband and little son. That isn’t easy when you’re so far from home!
But you made it through that first hurdle and now everyone is back home and you’re striving for some sense of normalcy. Unfortunately life isn’t quite back to normal yet. For a while there is still the balancing act of getting your husband to appointments, taking care of what used to be his workload at home and also taking care of your little boy’s needs.

I’m sure your son is excited to be back in school with his friends. As a transplant patient myself, I also understand your husband’s concern about trying to keep the home environment free from potential health risks while he’s early in his transplant. He is very vulnerable to illnesses and infections right now so he isn’t comfortable with the possibility of your son bringing germs home from school. Kids are germ bombs. ☺️

When I had my transplant I was already much older with no little children around. It was also before Covid. So I wanted to get a better perspective of life with children before I answered your posting. I spoke with a young father tonight, who recently had his transplant and has 2 children age 5 and under.

My friend suggested two things. First, the best people to ask would be your husband’s transplant team. They know your husband’s health situation, how well he’s recovering and if his blood numbers are returning to normal. His immune system is highly compromised right now. His team may have some good suggestions on how to balance home life with young children in the house.

The 2nd suggestion is to have your son take a short leave of absence from school temporarily until the worst of the cold and flu season is over. Could you consider that as a possibility? Are there workbooks and projects that your son could work on so that he wouldn’t be behind in school?

I know you have so much on your plate right now to manage. Is there a family member who can help you out from time to time? When was your husband’s transplant?

Jump to this post

Thank you very much for your message . It’s immensely appreciated!.
My husband has 1 sibbling member close by, and others California unfortunately not reliable . Everyone has their own life struggles going and can only help at times if they are able to,
God Bless 🙂

REPLY
2 replies
mrspix1975 | @mrspix1975 | Jan 27 11:04am
In reply to @royce "I understand your husband's concerns. A week before my wife's surgery for ovarian cancer, our grandson..." + (show)
@royce

I understand your husband's concerns. A week before my wife's surgery for ovarian cancer, our grandson and daughter visited us. Our grandson was coughing during the visit. Both my wife and I got some kind of viral infection. My wife's surgery had to be postponed. Luckily, everything went well with the surgery, she's been through the first chemo therapy and is on the maintenance chemo now. We have not visited or had a visit from grandkids since then. Our grandkids get sick after going to day care and school all during the flu/COVID season.

Jump to this post

Thank you so much for reaching out
I hope your wife and yourself are well!
Good Bless

REPLY
Mentor
Lori, Volunteer Mentor | @loribmt | Jan 27 1:04pm
In reply to @mrspix1975 "Thank you very much for your message . It’s immensely appreciated!. My husband has 1 sibbling..." + (show)
@mrspix1975

Thank you very much for your message . It’s immensely appreciated!.
My husband has 1 sibbling member close by, and others California unfortunately not reliable . Everyone has their own life struggles going and can only help at times if they are able to,
God Bless 🙂

Jump to this post

Please consider Connect as your life line. Obviously I can’t help in person but I’m here any time, along with other members who will offer moral support. As caregiver you’re going through a lot right now having to juggle pretty much everything. That gets overwhelming even without a small child needing your attention!
So I hope you are able to ask your husband’s sibling to spend time with him occasionally to give you a break. Your husband’s health and stamina should steadily improve over the next few weeks and appointments for blood work will stretch out to monthly at some point instead of every two weeks. This is just for a little while. So hang in there! You’re doing an amazing job! Sending a hug! Lori.

REPLY
Mentor
Lori, Volunteer Mentor | @loribmt | Feb 14 12:02pm
In reply to @mrspix1975 "Thank you very much for your message . It’s immensely appreciated!. My husband has 1 sibbling..." + (show)
@mrspix1975

Thank you very much for your message . It’s immensely appreciated!.
My husband has 1 sibbling member close by, and others California unfortunately not reliable . Everyone has their own life struggles going and can only help at times if they are able to,
God Bless 🙂

Jump to this post

Good morning, @mrspix1975 I’ve been thinking about you and wondering how you’re all adapting to life at home with a new BMT patient. I know it can’t be easy trying balance keeping your little boy happy along with protecting your husband’s health right now. How are you coping? Have you been able to come up with a feasible plan?

REPLY
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