Best way to enter a room without startling them

It's very easy to startle a person with hearing loss like this, especially when we are paying attention to something else. Your husband should also assume the responsibility of using his hearing aids to help make communication more fluid. That is a courtesy to you.

As a courteous strategy by you, I suggest you say his name when you enter the room to get his attention. Say something basic like "JOHN what are your watching on TV." or something like "John, here I am again." Putting his name first, whether the statement is important or not, should get his attention. We are used to tuning in to our own names.

This is a simple coping strategy that helps. I hope it works.

Thank you. I will try that.

People who can’t hear well often rely on other senses more heavily. You can try flipping the light switch to alert him. Also he may be able to hear frequencies lower than your voice better. A light foot stomp may work. He is likely to be aware of vibrations and moving air too. That could come from a swinging door pushing air toward him or walking heavily on a wooden floor.

Just be aware that as we age we become more focused and less tolerant of distractions and that is independent of your husband’s hearing loss.

@kmk123
And our husband does have some shared responsibility. He should wear his hearing aids and not put the whole responsibility for alerting him on you.

Your husband needs to use his eyes more if he won’t wear his hearing aids so he sees you when you enter a room. Maybe rearrange the rooms he sits in most and position him where he sits facing the doors where you enter so he sees you.

Another thought is to set up sensor lights that go off when you walk past a certain place that alerts him you are entering the room. The lights could be in front of where he sits and near the doors. There may also be options that make a sound as well as turn on lights.

Installing ring door bells outside doors of rooms he sits in can be pressed when you enter and exit a room. Sounds/flashing lights would alert him.

Your husband can also do his part not to yell at you since he cannot tell the volume of his voice when talking to you. He can use a smart phone to record a voice to text message and send it to you rather than have stressful communications where volume is not being adjusted to not stress you out in the interaction.

All of your thoughts are so helpful, and I appreciate you taking the time to share. The ‘more focused and less tolerant of distractions’ has definitely become a problem as the years have gone on.