Ashamed: I think about (and plan for) dying. Do you?

Huge congratulations to you on stepping up and acknowledging that there are unpleasant things that have to be done and you have the courage to do them.
Yes, dying will eventually get all of us. I am 88 and except for having to have a hip replacement I am relatively healthy. So far I am managing and intend to do so as long as I can. Hope you rest easy for the rest of your life.

Dying will eventually get all of us. I have lung cancer plus copd . I think about what its going to be like but don't dwell on it. I know the Lord will be there walking with me. I do have all my papers in order and what I want done. Got my stone, etc, will, DNR , and anything else. I went thru first losing my mom but at least dad was there, but when he died it was all left up to my sister and I. I was not going to have my girls make all those decisions and wonder if it would be what I would of wanted. Hugs and its all in Gods hands, one step at a time and enjoy your family.

My husband died of lung cancer very suddenly. He never talked about it. He was given a suggested two months but lasted a fortnight and was driving a week before he died. But we had done everything we needed to with the lawyer about five years beforehand and I had a fair idea what he wanted for a funeral. Three years later I haven’t got over it but he was lucky. He died in the hospice and they were wonderful to us all. He has very little pain. He wanted a secular funeral and it took us all three days to write the obituary choose the music and the coffin. I only cried when the undertaker gave me his wedding ring.
I too have put everything my family will need in a box. Name of lawyer, will, power of attorney documents, dates in my life and an account of my early life. I watched them do their father’s obituary and I thought it was good for them. But they were all so upset that they accepted his son on law’s offer to read it which he did beautifully. Please involve your family and don’t try to protect them.

So very sorry. I don't about dreaming when you are dead, but I can tell you from experience that a really good thing you can do for your family is to make your final arrangements the way you want them. Good luck to you and hugs.

Me too!only recently found out I have lung cancer.already thing about my own funeral! Very strange thoughts still hope Iam just having a bad dream. Thinking will I dream when I am dead??

Having worked for a probate and trust attorney for 23 years, I see this as practical and logical and certainly nothing to be ashamed of. Unfortunately too many people fail to make their wishes clear due to superstitious fears.

Yes, I have written my own obituary, so my family doesn't have to go thru it. I also have a written document providing information to the administrator of our Trust on methodology for paying monthly and annual obligations as long as my wife is living. After she passes, the Trust will handle disbursement of assets to our children.

All of this is in writing and part of our trust. I worked for a probate and trust attorney for 23 years before I finally retired. So I will make this reply a reminder to all who read this to make sure that when and if you decide to make a trust and/or will you should choose a reputable attorney. Not the ones who advertise and take you to lunch. Believe me the money is worth it. We had many cases where we had to "clean up" the messes left with trust not done correctly and assets left out which had to be probated anyway; something that having a trust is supposed to avoid. No good putting them in your computer unless you give your password to get in to someone. We also gave copies of our trust and the accessory documents that go with it to our children so they know exactly what is going on. Again, during my work, we were amazed that parents kept all that secret from their children. Why?

well said Marilyn. I also suggest you put all those plans in writing and give each family member a copy. Keep a copy in your files, in your computer. Wouldn't hurt to give a copy to your lawyer too. In that way it is YOUR choice, not anyone else's, so bad feelings and guilt should not ensue. You may need to remind everyone it isn't THEIRS to decide.

@harriethodgson1 As the eldest child I am trying to address this topic with my 90 yr old mother without success. Thank you for sharing as I too agree this is an act of love and kindness.