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Asperger Syndrome (Asperger's)
My young granddaughter's K-garten teacher, at the end of the year, told her parents that she saw some signs of possible mild Asbergers and she felt the child should be tested. Well, they "read about it on line" and also "talked to her Pediatrician" (who probably sees her for 15 min. every few months), and decided she was fine. Well, she is not fine. She is absolutely wild, and no matter what I do, I cannot connect with her. Her little brother? No problem .... he sits with me, reads, giggles, and is just playfully connected. He's a sweetheart. But, with my granddaughter, no success at all. It is as if I am a table sitting in the corner. I am afraid they are making a big mistake by not getting her tested, even if there is nothing there, it would be worth it. At the very least I am sure she is anxious and has ADHD.
Input anyone?
anonymous
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Dear Anon,
I can understand your concern, because I know that you care. However, there is not much else you CAN do ... or 'should' do actually. If the parents thought enough to take her to the pediatrician (you don't know for sure what took place) that means THEY care. There are children who are just 'wild' acting and they can be just fine as rain (except that they drive some people nuts! 🙂 ... I think you need to have faith in the parents that they will do what is best for this child.
Do NOT compare the little brother to her. As a retired teacher I can tell you how horribly damaging it is for siblings to be 'compared.' ...
Please don't be too anxious to insist that your granddaughter have some kind of a 'label'...as she gets older and interacts with others more, "IF" something 'needs to be done' ... it will be taken care of.
Psychologically, your 'expectations' of your granddaughter might also be contributing to her behavior... we usually get what we expect... but not what we demand of others.
I wish you ALL the best!
Bettyann
Hi Bettyann .... first I need to clarify something. I never have and never will say anything to my children about their kids ..... that is not my business or problem, just as I would never say anything to any of them about their decisions or choices of anything else. I believe if you saw and spent time with this child, you would leave scratching your head also. I won't go into detail, but it is not normal behavior for any age child, let alone 7 years. But, as I said, I say nothing ..... nothing any of my 3 adult children do or decide has any bearing on me. That is why I live 4 hours away, thankfully.
anon.
Hi having worked with children with asphergers they can definetely show all signs from any early age., the ADHD symptoms appear to go hand in hand with this. Generally I have found that these little children work well with routine in the home and in the school situation. They can certainly show behavioural issues. If the teacher has already recognized this it is good and can be dealt with within the learning in the school, and a program set up for your grandaughter I have worked with children that have been tested and diagnoised with asphergers and it is a good thing in my opinion to have this testing downat an early age. As it will be able to tell you the level to assist the child.I have seen children with a gifted level with aspbergers and worked with them accordingly. Take care Piglit
Hi piglit ..... I totally agree with you. In my experience raising my own 3, now 40, 38, and 29, I have found that experienced teachers can spot a problem quite quickly ..... they're trained, experienced, and if they have been teaching for any length of time, they can see something that new parents would not pick up. The earlier the better for the child to get help. As I said to Bettyann, I don't and will not say anything to my daughter about what I see, but I am afraid they may be sorry they didn't at least have her tested. If nothing snows up, that's wonderful. If it does, then she can get the appropriate help. I totally agree about routine .... that is something totally lacking in my daughter's home .... I don't know where in the world that came from, but it's there. It's sort of "fly by the seat of your pants living." There is no routine, no scheduled times for anything. I can see my daughter is really trying to do a good job, but things are so helter skelter that it's little wonder they can't accept even the possibility that the little girl should be at least tested. Also a piece of this is I think she's very bright, which often goes along with this situation.
Thanks for your input .... I appreciate it.
Barb
Hi Barb Always here anytime if you need me Take care Annie