Hi friends …. I just finished reading the article in the newsletter we get about “self talk” or whatever phrase was used. This is just my experience, so I do not propose this mindset for anyone else.
As others have said, I too have been depressed most of my life …. I especially remember it when I was a young teen. Of course, back then you wouldn’t dare tell anyone you felt “sad, unhappy” or anything like that because (in my house at least) I’d have gotten a smack across the face …. but I suspect most parents would just blow you off. Well, when I was about 35, after my 2nd child was born ….. I had terrible post-partum depression …. I had it after the first one was born also, but didn’t tell a soul. So, I went to a therapist in town who was a member of my church, and “spilled my guts.” (sorry) He immediately launched into “self-talk” ….. change the way you’re thinking, “what is the truth about this situation?”, and on and on. He suggested I get a book called “Self-Talk” by David Stoop. I did, read it several times, and like I do with books, highlighted lots (I’m a Librarians’s nightmare). I remained with this therapist for about 5-6 months, and I must admit, for awhile it seemed to be helping. But, my situation, mental health, and emotional illness went far deeper than any self-talk could touch. But, once again because I “knew” I had failed, I didn’t say anything to anyone. During this time, I actually led a small group for ACoA’s (Adult Children of Alcoholics) under the guidance of this same therapist. After about 10 more years, I couldn’t stand it anymore, everytime I got in the shower I started to cry – the ache inside was so bad; but, once again (as my then-husband, a Narcissist, kept telling me “you’re just nuts” …. that was really helpful!) I believed him. I was just a mess, couldn’t do anything right, and would be better off dead, but we had 3 kids by then. I went to my family doctor, and bless her, she was wise enough to tell me that this was a clinical depression and since she didn’t work with those types of medicines, she gave me the name and phone number of a Psychiatrist whom she thought was excellent. I also started in real deep therapy at that time with a PsyD who literally saved my life. I saw the Psychiatrist, he started me on a very low dose of Zoloft …… I was scared to death of “those kinds of drugs” and since I was “nuts” I knew they wouldn’t work. It’s supposed to take about 6 weeks for them to kick in. I took one before I went to bed that night, and for the first time in many, many, years, I slept really well, the whole night through …. that, to me was a miracle.
I’m not bashing self-talk, for minor problems, but when they go deep down into your very heart and soul and mind, you well may need more.
Liked by janicepike