Apprehensive, and asking for your advice pre RP

Thanks for your positive wishes and advice, I feel “better armed” with information and what to expect - and appreciate the little hints that are based on your unique experiences.

Appreciate very much the detail provided, and you are so right, lots of information out there and perhaps it’s best to focus on what to expect in the short term! Thanks for sharing your experiences and for your advice - a lot to take in but I am trying to absorb as much as I can - forewarned is forearmed!!

It turned out that my recovery nurse (here in CO, 2 years ago) had been a nurse for Patrick Walsh, a fairly famous prostate cancer surgeon. I thought it was sweet she mentioned that. Anyway, one tip she gave me is that I didn't actually have to change the catheter bag. Instead, I just wore gym shorts (even with a winter coat for my walks outside) and carried the catheter bag in a backpack I dangled next to my legs. It was not particularly obvious, and eliminated one set of learning challenges.
I also saw a physical therapist beforehand and she coached me to greatly increase my water intake and also on the pelvic squeeze--turns out to be something many women deal with post partum. In the subsequent days she also had some good tips on stretching, biking, and scar tissue, among others.
As others have said, the immediate challenge is going through the surgery. The rest will come in due time.

I know that many things are running through your head right now. For me, I had to wait months for surgery after my biopsy and again, for me, that was the worst part. The surgery was nothing compared to waiting, agonizing, reading others stories, and fearing the worst. I dreaded the catheter the most but it really wasn't that big of a deal. I only had it for seven days. I stocked up on pads due to things I read about incontinence but I didn't even need them. I feared leaking and incontinence but I ended up being fully continent when the catheter was removed. I had a median lobe growing into my bladder so I'm actually peeing much better now.I'm still working on e.d. but making progress. Honestly the fear and anxiety was worse on me than the surgery. My cancer was upgraded after surgery so i' m blessed that I got it out when I did. I chose surgery due to my age and pre-existing urinary problems. I also was blessed to have a great surgeon. Prayers and blessing to you as well my friend

I'll focus on just one aspect of the post-op period, which I'll define as the first three months...physical activity.

If you are someone who does routine, regular activity, be that golf, running, weight lifting, yoga, whatever, MAKE SURE you discuss with your surgeon after the surgery before you leave the hospital exactly what you usually do, and what they recommend doing/not doing. how to return, when, etc. "Physical activity" after surgery is not one-size-fits-all. E.g., you can walk right away, but you can't ride a bike for 3 months. And everything in between depending on the motions involved, the weights involved. Also, because each surgery is slightly different, there may be some things which apply in your individual case which only the surgeon would know about after having been in there and knowing exactly what they did inside, so the generic advice online might not be right for you.

If you are not routinely physically active, at a bare minimum you should commit to walking as soon as possible after the surgery (like, the afternoon after!), and every day forward. Walking is critical to (a) get your bowels moving again, (b) keep air moving through your lungs to prevent pneumonia, and (c) enhance the body's healing powers by increasing blood and oxygen flow.

Also, the less opioid medication you use (oxycontin, Vicodin, etc), the better as far as bowel function is concerned. Many/most of us after laparoscopic prostatectomy got by just fine on only Tylenol after leaving the hospital.

Thanks for taking the time to share your experiences…. I may just borrow the advice re the back pack! Cheers.

Thanks very much for sharing, this entire group is so very thoughtful to share their experience, advice and best wishes. All the best to you.

Thanks very much, I was interested to hear your experiences re physical activity post surgery. My hope is to do exactly as you suggested - get up and move around, sure it’s helpful from both a physical and emotional perspective.

I had my RALP in August of 22. My biopsy results were in May so I had 2 months to think about operation. Could be a blessing your husband's operation is in 8 days. I had no pain after operation, not even an aspirin required. The catheter is put in while you're knocked out. Didn't bother me a bit other than the idea of having a catheter. I just used the large cath bag and had it in a blue bucket when I was walking around the house. I had a towel over the bucket just not to be always looking at bag. Silly, but helpful. In hospital one night and was up and walking a couple of hours after operation. No pain. Had cath in 8 days. Removal was nothing. Fully continent after removal except for some dribbling maybe. I wore the pad underwear for 4 weeks but didn't need to. Surgeon on post op visit told me to stop wearing them actually. Definitely ask for Pelvic Floor physical therapy prescription after surgery so your husband knows he's doing Kegels properly. You have to wait 8 weeks or so before PT so you are healed up. Your husband may feel some shoulder pain after surgery. They say it's from the gas used during surgery. I think it's more from the fact they are pivoting you on the operating table for the robot arms. Anyhow your husband will be fine. Good luck. He'll experience tremendous relief after it's over. If he's still working tell him to take off as much time as possible on Medical. I was off work for 8 weeks. Rest is important for healing physically and mentally.

Hey Buddy, Great advice from everyone. I'll add that no matter what you've heard about "robotic". "non-invasive" and all the other catchphrases they throw at you, this is a major surgery. I had NO idea about how things would be afterwards even though friends - who had had other surgeries - tried to tell me. I never had any pain - in fact, after the IV drip of Tylenol I refused all opioid meds and never felt a thing.
BUT, your core has been manipulated and you will not be able to cough, sneeze or do any of those things without a feeling of unease. GET A PILLOW and have it by your side for the first two weeks; If you feel a cough or sneeze coming, grab it and hug it close to your diaphragm to prevent that feeling that your insides are gonna come out - HA!! That was the best advice I received and it truly saved me a lot of grief. Imagine you've done 10,000 situps - not pain, but sore, tender and the feeling of "get the hell away from me!" It's normal.
Also, and others have touched upon this - be sure you DO NOT strain on the toilet! I was on a soft and liquid diet for the first two weeks and I pooped just fine using Mira-Lax in a smoothie I would make every morning; it was effortless. But one day something didn't work and I really strained and I think I caused a lot of damage (blood in my urine afterwards) because I had to have a second surgery 3 months later when the opening from my bladder to the urethra closed. I didn't have the catheter in at this point so I think I must have torn some internal sutures or something. Just be careful and if you really can't go use a suppository or an enema - that's the loss of modesty and shyness everyone here is laughing about. You do what you gotta do!!
I still go for regular cystoscopies because they found a small bladder tumor during my surgery and having a young, beautiful nurse pull your dick thru a hole in a sheet and swab it with betadine is as normal and non cringeworthy as ordering a cup of coffee at Starbucks. You gotta laugh at yourself all the damn time, right guys??
Good luck with everything - you'll be fine and nothing is ever as bad as you thought it would be. Take your time going back to work - it took me 3 full weeks before I could swing my legs to get in and out of the car (there's that core thing again) even though I was walking at home on my treadmill with the catheter on my leg. Just picture that and you'll laugh for days!!