I would consider reading "The Road Less Travelled" by M. Scott Peck. I've been where you are before and I totally empathize. I came to a point in my life where I simply had enough of my insecurity and making the man in my life more important than me. It is not easy to disengage. But, I chose to work on myself, complete the goal I had been thinking about for a long time (achieving a masters degree). Take action. Focus on yourself. You deserve good people who bring you joy, not heartache. Know that.