I agree with so many things! When we talk to people, whether a caregiver, family member, friend, patient, we all just do the best we can. I listen to so many people say, if it ever happens, the first thing I'm going to is......BS You don't know until you are there and it happens and you seem to know, you just know....And people also do dumb stuff! We had 2 family members that just walked away! And we were both so good to both of them, we had friends walk away. People just don't know what to do. You have to set your own boundaries. AND LIVE!!

@lisab2 I agree with your take on well meaning comments from loved ones. So often conversations can be only about my husband and his needs, troubleshooting how to care for him, getting him help. I love it when loved ones turn the conversation to me and my needs. I, too, take them as support for and acknowledgment of my needs. There really is nothing they can do at this point but they are clear that they are available at a moments notice for a phone call, coffee, lunch or even staying with hubby while I go out. I assure them I won't hesitate to reach out if I need them.