Connect
← Return to Local, in-person stroke support group participation?
Discussion
Local, in-person stroke support group participation?
Stroke & Cerebrovascular Diseases | Last Active: Oct 2, 2023 | Replies (11)Comment receiving replies
I am so very sorry that your husband is struggling and taking it out on you. That must make a difficult job even much more so.
One thing that helped me was maintaining a gratitude mindset. When I was first admitted to the hospital, they told me up-front, "You don't know it now, but you're a very lucky man. You can still speak, remember, and think."
Ever since, I keep focused on the positives: I'm basically okay, I just can't move well. I have a home; a wife who loves me; I am getting better, if very slowly. Things could be so much worse. I bet half the population of the planet would trade places with me in a heartbeat.
I have many bad days, to be sure -- I am in constant pain, and sleep very poorly -- but I try not to let that keep me down. And while I sometimes snap at my wife, I don't make a habit of it. I know my stroke is not her fault, and without her, I'd be lost.
Come Christmas, it'll be five years since the stroke. It's a drag being disabled, but I'm still hanging on.
Your family is in my prayers. I wish you well.
Replies to "I am so very sorry that your husband is struggling and taking it out on you...."
Connect
It will be 6 years Oct. 25 since Jerry let me know he "need a doctor". I can never forget that morning and how I found out he had actually started on the stroke the day before at work but didn't want to say anything. We are VERY lucky it wasn't worse since treatment action was significantly delayed due to the patient's refusal to face what was happening. I wish he could adopt your attitude. Mayo told him he needed cognitive behavior therapy because he wouldn't accept what had happened to him, but he won't work at that. His motto has always been--if you ignore it it will go away and I don't need to change. Someone gave my daughter a meme that sums it up--You can't fix stupid but sometimes duck tape helps. People tell me overall I have developed a wicked sense of humor they find amazing with what I deal with sometimes. Obviously this is not one of those times when life is easier--he's pretty touchy so am just trying to weather the storm and wait for the wind to change. When it does the sun shines until the next cloud. My faith keeps me moving ahead and keeps the love alive even when there is not much to "love" --it is an action NOT an emotion. Days like now my hero is Abigail. It couldn't have been easy living with Nabal, but Scripture tells us she was deemed beautiful and respected by all. If I can figure out how to do what she did, I will have things better. Her name means Father's joy--not my name but hopefully I can manage to bring joy into every situation. Thanks for your encouragement. Who knows maaybe Jerry will watch your you tube spots with me. 🙂