SO hard when you feel like you’re taking their condition more seriously than they are. I empathize. Almost like a power struggle with the pain meds —- her power struggle with them. I’m so sorry you carry this burden. This stuff isn’t easy. I sometimes get the feeling that the outside world thinks the caregiver is supposed to perform like a perfect character in a version of “Father Knows Best”. There are still occasional arguments or disagreements. Still stress and tension from the caregiving role. And even though I empathize I don’t have any wisdom or advice or answers. I”m going through struggles with watching my husband NOT do the PT exercises and get weaker every month. Watching him NOT watch his sugar intake and my seeing his blood sugar ratings spike to alarming highs. I guess I would say that we as caregivers give “compassion in action” —- we may not have sweet words and tenderness on occasion, but we’re there every day offering the help and care continually. Sorry that I don’t know answers, but you sound like you’ve got a tremendous load with her care needs and your own.