Hello All, I put a whiteboard on our fridge. My husband writes what day it is every morning. Then, when he asks me what day it is, many times during the day, I tell him to go look at the whiteboard. If he can't get to the whiteboard easily, I tell him "Yesterday was Saturday...and tomorrow is Monday so today is ...." So far, he always knows the the answer. I think this keeps him engaged and helps him exercise his brain a little. He has not become frustrated with this so I continue to do it.
When I go out, he always asks when I'm coming home. We write it on the whiteboard. It's the same every Saturday - I grocery shop and come home at noon, for years now. Yesterday, when he asked me, I said, "Come on, you know when I'll be home," and he said "Noon." He may know, but he has a need to repeatedly check the information, because the memory of it doesn't stay with him for long.
I notice he tests himeslf often, asking me what street we live on, where we lived before we moved here. He is often happy that he already knew the correct answer.
I also learned not to announce his shower too early because he'll fixate on it and hound me to do it frequently, even if I've told him it will be later. Now I just tell him a few minutes before the shower so he can't fixate.
I recently saw a film called "The Father" with Olivia Colman and Anthony Hopkins. The story unfolds as the character with dementia perceives it. It was unsettling because I never knew what was what, what was true and what was false. It made me appreciate more how confusing dementia must be because reality for the person with dementia is always changing. Watching the film I felt as if the ground was always shifting under my feet. It was eye opening to be in that situation myself.