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How about a laugh, (hopefully)
Just Want to Talk | Last Active: 14 hours ago | Replies (3622)Comment receiving replies
Reading this at 1am as cant sleep.... I am only another human being no better no worse than others in the long run. We are all created equals and our lives are shaped by genes and by how we are raised, our parents values taught to us etc. I cannot really go on because I am not a social worker or therapist, but I am now older and with illness and esp. last three years , it has changed me... from a kind person, maybe not the highlight of the party, but in my own way being nice to those I met, and helped family how I could; how that has been taken away from me by my physica and mental situation and I dont like myself very much. Only from the above I wonder if maybe as I was/am a "sensitive" person; i recall reading a book titled The Highly Sensitive Person and I checked all the boxes. Some people can be called names such as gaunt, and many others of course, and that rolls off their backs... I dont know how they do it... my husbands cousin, she has so many problems and going through eye trauma and needles into the eyes yet doesnt talk about it and I feel doesnt worry about it as much as I would; but we are all equal but all different in so many ways. A lot of chat boxes here are quoted favourite sayings, or well known ones and comes to mind: Be True To Yourself. If you cannot be kind to others, dont be unkind, etc. However, we canot expect others to feel the way we do and say the things they say to have certain impacts on us: yes you will have to make a decision, remove this person from your live, or, another saying: Forgive And Forget. ...well better try and get to sleep, i listen to relaxation tapes on you tube on ipad on pillow nest to me,,,the words can be so very comforting and its if the person is peaking only to me! Take care and best wishes, J. (ps excust typos, dont this int he dark! J.
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in reply to @lacy2 Thank you for taking the time to both read my "story" and comment on it as well.
I am sorry that you do not like yourself very much, and I know that no one can change that but you. However, one thing I have found helpful is that I was able to develop a greater sense of gratitude once I became ill. When we are either at a certain age, have some kind of disease, gratitude is often the only thing one can have left. I have to remind myself of this every day, using the same mantra over and over: I got another day, many did not. Or, I have running water and electricity. Or, there are people who would give their right arm to have what I have: many abilities. Even so, this overwhelming sense of gratitude is often marred by the comments to others that I perceive as a personal attack. Okay, maybe "gaunt" is not insulting. But to me, it felt like one of those memes: "Oh, you look so much better with makeup on today." Also, the fact that she suggested that I pray because "when we can't fix it, God can." This is akin to saying, "God will take care of you." I am an agnostic. Show me the proof. If "God" will take care of me, then why have I lost 40 pounds, look skeletal and have no appetite. Is this "God's" plan for me? I am not writing this because I intend to insult anyone who is a "believer." I respect everyone's choice of religion. The "friend" in question wears her Christianity like a badge and as I have said before, Jesus is her opiate. I actually wrote a letter to this person after her first comment, but at the behest of my sister and close friend, did not mail it. Now I kind of wish I had because one of the questions in my letter was: "What do you think Jesus would have thought about your comment to me?"
You are so right that we are all equal but in different ways. As such, we all need to treat each other as equals, not treat people as "less than."
Your comment has helped me a great deal, and I appreciate the time you took to post your comment, in the middle of the night at that! Thank you, thank you ,thank you