I'm lonely I have no friends and it feels stupid

HI!

I started watching sports on TV. It gives me something to talk about with people. 🙂

Hi, again!

I used to be a teacher. It can be hard to see everybody in the room. Seriously, sometimes I missed a kid in the room, just by accident.
Haha- did you have your head down? Or did the girl in front of you have big hair?

I'm pretty old now, but I remember high school and middle school well. It can be pretty awful at times! But, you know what, it does end! Some people say that it's the best time of their lives. Me, I'd never want to go through that again!

Sometimes we have to be our own best friends.

Are there any old people near you? They can be friends, too. Maybe you could offer to help them in some way? Mow the lawn, sweep the porch-- something outside to start.

Don't forget to look to your own family members for friendship.

--from Anne, the old teacher : )

@shnokeyq It's hard to talk to people. Take a deep breath and calm yourself. I bet you might feel funny if your voice is changing, also. Practice like you do, and learn to listen to how you sound, the pattern and rhythm of your speech. You will find you can tell when you are nervous. Talk to your pet, read aloud, practice, practice, practice.

You have gotten some great suggestions here. Being on the spectrum at any point, many others might point at us and take exception to us. That's bullying. Be strong! I am right here for you!
Ginger

it is true that when you are ignored or overlooked, the other persons are missing out on a wonderful person. Keep growing and expanding the many good and wonderful qualities of "you", stay encouraged, don't give up on yourself and your potential. In time you will be noticed and welcomed, and Oh, how good it will feel. You'll continue onward and upward from there. God bless, young friend.

Hi Snokeyq,

How ya doing?

You mention kids in your neighborhood. Maybe try this: go outside with a ball and glove (or some other thing that more than one person can use together). Throw it around and catch it until some other kids show up. Ask them "do you want to practice some X ? " If you say "practice," then no one will expect you to be a great player already.

If you play video games, you probably have good hand-eye coordination. To play outside ball games, you just need to bring that skill to a wider, bigger realm. And maybe work on upper body strength?

All the boys in my neighborhood used to play ball in my driveway, so I heard them talk a lot. One kid was actually mean, but sometimes the nice boys sounded mean when they really were joking around about stuff. Most of the time, all they talked about was the game they were playing-- "nice shot, bad shot, too far to the left"-- stuff like that. Just observing and stating a fact.

If a kid says something that sounds mean, sometimes you can diffuse it.
He says, "You stink at baseball." (He might be mean, or he might be stating a fact 🙂 haha )
You say, "Yeah, I know, That's why I'm out here practicing. (laughing) If you're so good, then show me how to do it."

If you have a driveway, try a basketball. You don't need a net. Just practice your dribble. The sound of a basketball used to bring out every kid in my neighborhood, like the sound of the ice cream truck. A basketball is much louder than a baseball. haha

Good luck, buddy! Keep us posted on what's happening with you, ok? Let us know which suggestions you've been able to try and how they worked out.

PS- don't ignore the little kids if they ask to play. : )

There are some great suggestions that kind people posted. I would start by checking with mom about visiting a therapist or counselor. They try to put you at ease first thing which is comforting. Please let us know how you are doing.

I think you're running into puberty issues -- at your age my best pal was a boy, and in a short time that was considered inappropriate. I'd like to suggest that not all friends have to be for playtime or schoolgrounds. If yours is a safe neighbourhood, could you get someone to help you locate shut-ins and seniors so you could offer your help with day-to-day things, maybe starting with their pet care needs, or help with YouTube, or putting away grocery deliveries. I think it would benefit you to be the helping person rather than the needy person. If you are fairly mature, trustworthy, and not the type to harm anyone, you could build a circle of friends. Your volunteering would be self-directed, which might keep your anxiety down and make you more comfortable talking, in a setting where topics of conversation just present themselves.

Hey Shnokeyq!
Another old teacher here. I agree that you must be a pretty remarkable 13 year old to reach out on this forum. You've gotten some good suggestions, some you may want to try, and others that maybe just aren't your style.
Remember this, though: Many successful, happy and even famous people have gone through lonely teen years. It feels bad now, but it will pass.
I promise.
Peace.

Oh, sweetheart, it breaks my heart to hear what you are going through. Have you tried joining Autism clubs? In the town over from where I live, there are all sorts of activities and opportunities for young people to make friends. By the way, I am Autistic and ADHD as well. Until you can connect with a real live group perhaps it would be helpful to join online, Facebook groups for those
of us on the Spectrum. I hope you will consider joining clubs that spark your passions. ( special interests, some call it) Your people are out there, trust me! And please, be yourself. The right people will find you and love you for it.

Also, I wanted you to know about a support group called SupportyMcGroupFace. It is on Facebook. Annd, my ten year old grandson has a similar situation to you. He is autistic and has no friends at school. There are no children his age in the neighborhood. The only kids who are nice to him are the kids in his class at church. I saw some really great comments on here for possible solutions. I think you've made some pretty great friends here. Now for the flesh and blood ones to appear as you navigate your opportunities. PS....you seem like a great kiddo, one I would be honored to know.