← Return to Loss: I am stuck in the "angry" stage. How can I move on?

mikaylar (@mikaylar)

Loss: I am stuck in the "angry" stage. How can I move on?

Loss & Grief | Last Active: Jun 8 10:41pm | Replies (36)

Comment receiving replies

Hi, @mikaylar I'm Scott and I lost my wife to brain cancer. Your post made me think about my own journey with grief. While I realize everyone is different and our journeys with grief vary widely, here is what I found/experienced.

I let grief take its course. I actually threw away every book folks had given me that talked about the 'stages' of grief. I found my grief was mine and not something that could be dictated to me in how I was to move through it, accept it, etc. Like I said — just me, but accepting that grief was now a partner in my life allowed me to feel it without guilt about how it was affecting me on any particular day or time of day.

I also found a therapist who was a terrific listener and allowed me to process/rant/vent and help me understand those feelings.

One thing I still do is that I keep a "To Do" list and make sure I do one thing on it a day — plus as I finish one item I always add a new one to the bottom of the list. Some are big, most are small, but each one gives me a goal every day and helps me look forward to at least a portion of each day.

Thank you for posting and I hope the sun is shining wherever you are today!

Strength, Courage, & Peace

Jump to this post

Replies to "Hi, @mikaylar I'm Scott and I lost my wife to brain cancer. Your post made me..."

Thank you both for your encouragement and prayers. As you know, some days are better than others. My situation is that it keeps coming back to deal with. My brother exploded his row house and rendered 2 other homes besides his destroyed to the ground and contemned 2 other homes. 8 people lost their homes, 3 of which were children. The property is in limbo because I am the only heir and don't want to get involved. Eventually, I will have to sign off on the property so it can be rebuilt as it is not safe in the neighborhood. His urn of ashes is still at the county coroner 2 years later – at least I think it is. I don't want it. So, here I am….stuck in anger stage. I loved him more than anyone but I hate him too for what he did to innocent families and our family.