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Caregiver: Dealing with delirium, confusion after long hosptial stay
Caregivers | Last Active: May 6, 2023 | Replies (21)Comment receiving replies
Delirium is fairly common for older folks when they are in a hospital or rehab, away from home. They lose memory of home. Though both my husband and mother had stroked, their confusion from stroke was somewhat different from the delirium I saw with dementia. Sundowning is common for all.
He needs his medication and because you are the daughter, he can resist you. Did he have any services for home care? Can you hire someone? I know it costs and Medicaid only kicks in with assets under $2k.
But it seems clear a third party is needed here. Another possibility is hospice. Is that possible? You can be on hospice for months or even years. That would mean an aide, nurse, social worker, volunteer and chaplain in my area.
Would a rest home or assisted living be acceptable? (I doubt it) Is he competent? Do you have proxy (invoked?), Power of Attorney, joint bank account? You will need these things.
Do you have a local council on aging to seek support? I just came from my long time group and it is so helpful. I feel for you! YOU are important too and so take care of yourself as much as you can. I know that is hard.
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Hi, thank you for your reply!
The hospital said it was delirium, especially since it started suddenly about 2 days after being admitted. It's just far too similar to dementia so it's hard to know what is really going on. I know Alzheimer's runs in his family too, so there's a good chance now.
I actually live in Canada, so I don't know how similar our options are and what costs are associated with that. I'm just a bit disappointed that the care team at the hospital sent him home without giving me any support or information for anything at all, so I don't even know where to look for help.
If my father was not a highly stubborn man, I would already have help right at this moment. I cannot, for the life of me, imagine him getting up and agree to be taken anywhere else other than home. I am his power of attorney for his personal care, I have the legal right to place him in any kind of facility if needed. But, it would take a village of people to take him out of the house.
I feel like my only option is to keep him here for as long as it is safe to do so, but how do I know when it is no longer safe? He can move around just fine, he does not leave the house at all but I worry that the confusion will cause him to wander off at night. He does not have a set sleep schedule and wakes up every couple of hours, remains awake for 5 or 6 hours and sleeps again for 1-2 hours. Yesterday he was sitting on the veranda at night and he had closed the front door behind him for some reason. Luckily he did not lock it, or he would've been in trouble there.
I'm just lost. I feel trapped and defeated.