Well your options are limited BUT not impossible. Keep your appointment with your attorney and explain what really is going on. Your Lawyer and MD can take this in front of a judge to rule him incompetent to make decisions or sign any legal forms. I know it sounds harsh but since he can’t be cooperative then for your own sanity you have to do what needs to be done. Insure that your safety is your #1 priority! As well, know that anyone losing their independence are angry, scared, as well as all emotions that go with dementia. Prayers heading your way…..David

Hello, @marye2 I read your post with interest as it reminded me of going through a similar situation with my wife as she declined. I know everyone, every situation, and their journeys are unique but here is what I did to get this critical issue taken care of. While my wife was initially reluctant to do this, I told her if anything happened to either of us and we didn't have a will, the government had one for us (by law) and they would dictate what and where our assets went. She quickly agreed she'd rather have our personal say-so in these matters!

I talked with my wife so I understood her basic desires for the important stuff. Then I went to our lawyer and we drafted our documents -- will, estate plans, durable POA, medical POA, advance directives, etc. I then took the drafts home to discuss with my wife in almost final form. This way it was not as overwhelming to her and she could just react to things rather than have to create it all. There were actually very few changes she wanted. In our town, our attorney actually came over to our home with his secretary to witness, notarize, etc. the signings.

Strength, Courage, & Peace