Then do it! I'm like you with anger creeping up when I'm in this state. When I was a caretaker for my mom, even on the day it took her to die, I had to leave the house to refresh my mind and take a break. I no longer feel bad about it but we were all better for it.
If I have to take a break from Dave now I will. But to tell you the truth a strident part of his personality has vanished and he is nicer! He is less sarcastic, or not at all. HELLO, I am actually loving being home with him now. We have fun, and joke, and when he's serious or confused I can spend that time with all my heart and attention on him without any resentment.
My social outlets now are the people who are helping us get settled and letting us live peacefully too. Yesterday was a bizarre day and I was so relieved when people left. It was like, ok it's us again!
It's nice to meet you. Can I ask what is the type of job that you're looking at?
It’s nice to meet you also, @merpreb. I’m with you on deep breaths when company leaves. Wonderful while they’re here and sometimes bittersweet but nice to wave farewell. I have ideas for employment but no job in hand as this is something I’ve thought about for months but not pulled the trigger on. I’m passionate about learning. I can work remotely, which I’ve done with instructional design, but contract work can get intense and I don’t need that right now. Many friends and acquaintances have suggested I write our story, and my husband and I are taking a class from a published author starting this Tuesday for that very thing. I don’t know where that will lead, but it could provide at a minimum the social outlet I’m seeking and a feeling of personal accomplishment. I’ve applied to two jobs, one remote, part-time supporting a medical services company that works with seniors, and the second is part time in a library for minimum wage. I’d love to take that one on. My dream job would be a job share teaching language arts and social studies combined to 5th graders in a private school. Afternoons only. That’s pretty specific, but one can dream.