@elsea134 my sisters and I found ourselves in the exact same situation as you. Our mom was 98 yrs and lived in independent living. She totally took care of herself. She would even use her walker and go to the dining room and pick up her meals! When we suggested that someone should come in to help her bathe and dress in the mornings and get ready for bed at night, she was adamant that she didn’t need help. We finally got her to agree with a short trial. The 3 women who shared the job were wonderful and my mother liked them so much. When it was decided that mom had to move to assisted living. (She was now 99), she asked that the same 3 be allowed to come also and continue to help her. Unfortunately, she died 1 month after her birthday.
Making decisions for our mother was very difficult but eventually she relaxed and totally enjoyed the attention.
I know you’ll do what’s best for your mom and I wish you the best as you make decisions.