Hi Shane!
First off, you’re definitely not a terrible person and you’re not going to be “labeled” as anything other than a fellow human being being human! Great to hear that you’ve got a doctors appointment. And, yup, be honest with them. I’m sure they’ve heard it before so don’t worry about that. I lied to my doctor for a long time because I was ashamed. It wasn’t until I landed in the back of an ambulance that I had my “duh” moment. First thing is to be honest which you are certainly doing now. Good for you! I don’t know whereabouts you live, but try to look up the phone number of your local Alcoholics Anonymous. They should have a local helpline staffed by a volunteer and he or she should be able to help as you’re going through your current situation for the next few days until you can get things sorted out with your doctor. Even though they’re AA, they’ll be able to loop you into someone at Narcotics Anonymous or some other appropriate person. Mayo has a wonderful Intensive Addiction Program that I went through and now I’m 7 years sober. Maybe you can reach out to them, too, but for immediate help I suggest the AA/NA call. Wow, today is Thanksgiving. All of us on this thread don’t know each other but we’re fellow human beings being grateful! Hang in there, Shane, we’re all grateful to know you!