This must be so tough for you! We had the opposite problem two years ago. My husband and I decided to relocate over thousand miles away from where we lived most of our lives. My daughter, who has her own family, was quite upset with me about the move and didn’t speak to me for awhile. We finally were able to reconnect. Time helped all of us to think about how to move forward. We have no plans to go back, but we are talking with our daughter and son-in-law about different contingencies and what they and we want to happen when my husband and I will need help.

My suggestion is that you and your son come up with a plan and put together resources, make a list of family/friends who can step in to help out. Decide together at what point and under what circumstances your son would need to return. Ultimately, try to create a workable plan.