Lonely and Just want to talk with virtual friends here

Hi JM
all I have right now is an ear to listen. Please tell me, if you want to, a little more about yourself. I can’t imagine what it is like to live in Lafayette let alone a nursing home! (I am kidding)…

I am newly a widow and not young and don’t have a ton of friends (except my two cats). Just wanting to try this group to see if it is for me.
C

I am a 79 yr female with disabilities. I use a cane and walker. I now live with my son and his family. I used .to be very active, but now I do not drive. I feel like I am tolerated as long as I go by the family rules. I can cook, somewhat, do my own laundry, clean my room and shared bathroom. I have a hugh TV, a tablet, a cell phone. I have art supplies, and jewelry making supplies, but I shake a lot and am not able to motivate myself. I am pretty much a people person. My son takes off work to .take me to Dr's appts. I do not sleep well at night due to neuropothy in my feet and. calves. So I sleep a lot during the day. My son takes me to church with the family when they go. and takes me to play dominoes oncw a week with folks my own age and older. But there is never any peronal chat. One gentleman is 99 yrs, he is so keen minded, I am very envious of him...in a good way.
I just need so desperately need someone to talk to.......any takers?? Jean West..Texas

Hi, @cloudycarol I'm Scott and welcome you to Mayo Connect. I hope you find this community something you are looking for. I came to Connect while I was my wife's caregiver and was looking for some answers, help, and the chance to communicate with others who understood what I was experiencing. I especially liked that I could post here at any time of day or night and then check back in whenever I had a few free moments.

Once I became a widower one of the things I did was to start a 'to do' list that I kept going each day. It was made up of lots of little things (write a card, call someone, read a newspaper article, watch a bit of an old movie, try and find a friend of old, etc. I vowed to do one item a day and then add one item to the bottom of the list so it would not stop. I found it really helped fight my feelings of loneliness!

I hope we get to hear from you again here!

Strength, Courage, & Peace

Hi @jjwest, allow me to bring you into a discussion with @SusanEllen66 @rivermaya34 @gregoryz @sandysurf @linh @jan62 @emil @poppyseed123 @ann16 and quite a few other members. See here:
- Lonely and Just want to talk with virtual friends here https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/very-lonely/

Even when surrounded by family members, like your son and his family, you can be void of personal chat that help you feel connected.

@ellamster started this discussion to bring Connect friends around the virtual kitchen table. I think she just made a fresh pot of coffee, so pull up a chair and join in.

Jean, what's a fun or funny thing you'd like the group to know about you?

Hello Jean - I am not lonely because I can still get around, but am frustrated by tremors as well, so my jewelry and art supplies were gathering dust and making me feel bad.
A couple years ago, an artist friend started teaching paint-alongs that were not satisfying for me because of the tremors - her style is realistic, I couldn't get there!
So she introduced me to a watercolorist who taught me a new way to paint. I don't know the real name of the technique, so I call it "dribble and tilt" (my little sister says that's a perfect name for unsteady seniors.) You create a very thin watercolor, dribble 2-3 colors on your paper, spritz with a little water, then move the paper around to create some abstract shapes. Then look at it from several angles, pick a blot or two that look vaguely like a flower or tree and begin building - with more dribble or a few imprecise brush strokes. Makes some pretty abstract flower/landscape pics, after dry I can embellish - have made a few cards to send.

As for jewelry - I can manage beads/stones as big as a dried bean or marble, but I packed up all the tiny stuff - seed beads, fine needles, tiny findings - and passed them on to a young Mom in the neighborhood through our local "Buy Nothing" group on Facebook. She is making jewelry to sell at Craft Shows. It feels good to not look at it, and to know someone is using it.

I don't know if either of those ideas is a help, but thought I would share.
Sue

Are you getting your pain taken care of? I had two knees replaced, the best thing I had done at the time.
I now have arthritis of the back which limits my ability to walk great distances. It is tough getting old, I can take anything so long as there is no pain.

I’ve messed with my head for just about as long as I’ve had one, I guess. Sometimes self-administered like spinning real fast on a merry-go-round and trying to stand up, and other times when I went to a doc with a complaint and they gave me a drug which sometimes helped and sometimes didn’t. Other times I tried things offered to me at parties or various get-togethers, usually ones Harry Anslinger wouldn’t have approved of.

Point being, there are those of us for whom cheap thrills are just fine and others for whom quality of life includes not being depressed or in pain of various kinds when there are treatments available, while there are others for whom (as Donovan sang) “the natural high is the best high of all.” And there are others who find a middle path. I’m still trying to decide where I stand. I’m usually too busy jumping around to find out.

Man, I am sorry to hear some drug robbed you of your colorful dreams, and I can understand why you’d be loth to have a chance with any more.

Bummer. Are you sure there might not be a way (or several ways) back to the kaleidoscopic dreams of yore? I hate to think of you permanently cut off from that. It sounds wonderful and special.

I just tossed my petty problems into the rubbish, hearing your question. My unfortunate and short answer is, no. I can’t think of anything. If we put our heads together, though, perhaps we can dream something up. Are they giving you any meds to feel better? Do you have a CD player for some Steve Riley & the Mamou Playboys? Or Chubby Carrier? How about food? The nursing home food probably sucks. Can anyone smuggle in some catfish gumbo? What’s your spiritual life like, if any?

I’m open to talk, or if you just need to heap abuse on someone, go for it.

You’ve got my ears, and maybe even a little heart and mind.