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Been through that kind of thing. There is only one way to deal with this, and that is you must stay away. If you can't stay away because they are family, you must not care or let these people under your skin. Be civil but, you must do a cold turkey emotional write off. Understand that your relationship with this person will never be good and they will queer your relationship with anyone you have in common. It is a wide world out there surround yourself with better people. Further when you ask for advice or describe this kind of thing to people who blame you and put your worries off that is a sure sign that those people do the same thing. They can't comfort you because they themselves are guilty of mistreatment bearing false witness, lying and falsely maligning. Good luck, some people enjoy being jerks.
Replies to "Been through that kind of thing. There is only one way to deal with this, and..."
Agree. Life has a way of exposing the true character of certain people. Truth always comes to the surface. Jerks are jerks and it is best to have little interaction with some people. They will find other innocent victims to dump on. Such people educate us in many ways, i.e. who to avoid!!!!!
Avoid anyone until you can get your own life together. Why would a kind hearted person get into family dynamics unless you also mislead them? Everyone has hopefully learned a valuable lesson. For me, never give anyone the time of day who lives with his mother and what he owns is in a box. Not a grown person. Some times we have to accept accountability when we knowingly hurt someone.
If you lost a loved you hurt just make sure your third marriage doesn't begin the same way.
Thats the saddest part that another innocent victim is going to be charmed and manipulated and by the time the truth is revealed most of the damage will be done. Sociopaths are charming, cheaters, could care less about how they impact lives all just to satisfy their own needs.
Do you think rehab is successful with sociopaths? Curiously
Since I have no idea what a sociopath is, I can't comment. I feel there are good doctors/medical people out there who can help people -- of course, that is if a "person wants help."
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I too have been through this. On the receiving end of a false marriage. A marriage that began with lies and ended in lies. Your discomfort is understandable and you should move on. Get your own place and distance yourself from family that is siding with the person. If you hurt someone it's normal for feelings of resentment. Own what you did but don't own what you did not. I agree people are jerks especially people who put two cent's on matters they know nothing of. Someone who is clueless calling a victim a jerk is a jerk.