Depression and Personal Hygiene

Posted by nscappa @nscappa, Jul 25, 2022

Hello,

My name is Nancy and I have had had clinical depression for many years but it has really never been a problem. I have worked for 45 years but since three big events in my life almost 7 years ago (I left my job because my sister had a rare form of cancer, and I just couldn't concentrate any more. During this time my precious cat Sabrina was dying from kidney disease so she would sit on my lap while getting her fluids just like in a hospital (very difficult). On September 20th my sister passed away from the cancer. I left my job in August, Sabrina died a short time before my sister Judy passed in September. Since that time my depression has worsened and I am having difficult completing what should be very common things, like washing my dishes, doing my washes, but the most difficult one is taking a shower. You would think I were going to have a root canal. Anyone else having this much difficulty??? On top of that, my car died last summer, and I feel like I have lost my independence because we are a bit isolated. I'm also on a very strict budget which really doesn't help at all. Thanks for any responses. : )

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artsy6013 | @artsy6013 | Jul 26, 2022

Hi Nancy:
I just wanted you to know that you are not alone in your aversion to taking showers. When I first saw your post I couldn’t believe that someone else had that particular problem resulting from depression. I take the shower but sometimes not until afternoon and I am fighting myself all the way! But then I do it and I do feel better for a while. Go figure!
Thanks so much for sharing sister!
Mary

marjou | @marjou | Jul 26, 2022

@artsy6013 Hey Nancy and Mary, I am with you ladies!

artsy6013 | @artsy6013 | Jul 26, 2022

@marjou
Are you saying that you have the same shower hesitancy syndrome as me and @nscappa? This is really a wild discovery! I wonder what the root of this problem is. I mean it is like pulling teeth to get me in the shower even though it doesn’t take much time to complete. I have started saying (to myself at least) that my return to the pre-depression world will happen when I can just go in the shower without thinking twice 🚿

nscappa | @nscappa | Jul 26, 2022

nscappa (me) took my shower and washed my hair yesterday (Yea) and it felt terrific even though I won't admit how long it has been. Even hinting at the time makes me sick. It is like going to the dentist to have a root canal. Really??? This started happening when I went through three major incidences in my life in just 2 months. After leaving my job (because my sister had cancer and I couldn't concentrate any more) I lost $12,000 a year (I'm on a fixed income). I knew it would be rough but I didn't think it would be this difficult. I know some people put this syndrome on old age (I will be 75 on September 2nd) but, in my case, I'm really not sure. I always loved clothes and I always looked very put together (not bragging). Now, (I live in a rent-controlled building) I even put clothes on that have some wrinkles (NEVER BEFORE) so that's a big red flag. I can deal with not doing the dishes for a couple of days, maybe not dusting, but this shower thing has to stop. Any other shares???

marjou | @marjou | Jul 26, 2022

In reply to @artsy6013 "@marjou Are you saying that you have the same shower hesitancy syndrome as me and @nscappa?..." + (show)

@artsy6013 Yes, I do too!

anne4u | @anne4u | Jul 26, 2022

I’m sorry for your losses. You’re story sounds so much like mine! I’m going through the same things with depression right now. I’ve been through a lot of change recently and find I’m isolating a lot more. Like you I have been cooking, or at least making food that is healthy. I’m going to force myself to shower today because I have to go to the doctor tomorrow! I’ve been pulling my hair back and putting it off another day! I have a dog so she keeps me moving to some extent. I walk her during the week but as hot as it’s been, I wait until evening. I also have a standing date once a week with my mom. We have dinner and I take my dog and hers and walk on her property. I know exercise is important so I try to incorporate some in my week. It gets me out of the house as well. Lately I only leave for doctors appointments or an occasional outing. I see a therapist twice a month (by phone) and she encourages me, but like you I know it’s up to me. It helps to read your post and know I’m not alone. I’m on an antidepressant that has helped but I go through difficult cycles. That seems to be the nature of MDD.
I try to be patient with myself and not beat myself up, which is hard when I want to see more progress! I practice meditation which gets me out of my own head! A little exercise, eating good, having my dog to take care of and doing what I can for chronic pain conditions keeps me pretty focused. But my depression can still overwhelm me at times. I try to incorporate gratitude into my daily meditation. I’m very blessed! It sounds like you have a positive spirit and are putting one foot in front of the other! I believe if we do that we will come out the other side, one day at a time! Have you considered getting another kitty? I live alone so having a pet to care for as well as the unconditional love has made such a difference for me.