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I just logged in and appreciate all your stories especially the feathers still showing up! I too have meltdowns after less than a year of caregiving and find myself wondering how long this will go on. My spouse is in hospice care, but they won't give me the crystal ball I would like to see! Jenny's delirious periods seem to be increasing in frequency and intensity. Yesterday she got really upset when her daughter and I told her that she had NOT made cookie dough and I would not turn on the oven to bake it. Then last night she cried that nobody here knew her name, nobody gives a c*** and nobody even checks on me! She won't take ativan to calm down - maybe I should take it!
Thanks for listening.
Replies to "I just logged in and appreciate all your stories especially the feathers still showing up! I..."
Good morning, @deek15redpeppers I got a nice chuckle out of your comment in your post about the crystal ball. Our daughter actually brought me an old Magic Eight Ball she found at a garage sale! I kept it out for years and it gave me the same quality of insight into our future as anything else in caregiving 🙂 It's still on my desk, too.
One of the biggest challenges for me was when I'd know the truth about something, but my wife would insist it was something different. More often than not I'd find myself just agreeing with her, telling her I'd take care of it, and find that she tended to forget about it. It was less distressing to her than when I'd disagree with her. Not a medical opinion, but I figured this was because she'd already had to give up so much of the controls in her life.
I can't count the number of times I got told I wasn't providing the care, concern, love, etc. she needed. At least this changed over time, but when it would happen it was really hard to keep telling myself "it's not her, it's the darn disease talking".
If I may ask, is your wife in hospice care at home or at a facility?
Strength, Courage, & Peace
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@deek15redpeppers Can you contact her hospice team to check for possible assistance, how to live through these episodes? From my experience with hospice, it is also for the family, not just the patient.
Remember to take care of yourself, too.
Ginger