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Parenting a Teen with Fetal Alcohol SyndromeAbout Kids & Teens | Last Active: Mar 24, 2022 | Replies (14)
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Replies to "Hi there, we have a 15 yr old with fas. we are looking for help and..."
Weve known for 5 years but it was kind of like they all said treat this treat that odd bpd anxiety adhd not sleeping on the austism spectrum high functioning about 25 meds…. the last 5 weeks worst depression ever. We have found a dbt therapist who knows her stuff about fas and we r self educating but j stopped going to therapy 1 month ago and hasnt gone to school for 7 days. We are doing this for our sanity..even if she won't go on board..ive lost my dad to this bc of ignorance. Its accepting alot that we havent known basically told its just the frontal lobe impulse control and bad decision making..had no idea of all the other crap. She was in residential for 3 months one year and 8 months in 2019 hell on earth the last 3 years. 1 Suicide attempt. And we know we can't discipline aka rewards and punishments the same but today went to a whole new level and im just passed wipe..no one i know even knows 1 tenth of what we and her go thru. I recently sent out a letter to friends and family except my dad about our life even sent fasd info and lacking executive skills and cognitive thinking..I am sooo angry at her birth mom for doing this to her and 4 other siblings…thanks for listening im sorry you all have and r going thru this
I realize this is a year after you posted it, but my husband and I adopted 2 unrelated kids from Russia in 2004. They were 25 months and 8.5 months when they were adopted. Our daughter was sneaky, already learned some orphanage ways of hiding & sneaking. She had CAS, FAS, LD, CI, EI and a boatload of other stuff. Inside her body. She was 15 pounds & 27” tall at adoption. Our endocrinologist said if there were a 5th or 6th degree of hypotrophy, she would be there. She was like a tiny pixie who could run, climb, skip, do the monkey bars on the small park—more tiny size equipment. She could climb anything with only her fingers. She went into kindergarten at 21 pounds & 33”. The principal looked at her with her tiny backpack & told us, He thought his 4 month old boy was bigger than Gabby! She made quite an impression on the gym teacher that year. He brought down the ropes. They went in alphabetical order. Gabby, with the last name of Smith was close to the end. Everyone else had struggled to make it even to the halfway point. Gabby went to the top & started to swing for the light covers.. the teacher panicked & just screamed for the principal. The school secretary found him & said something happened with one of the kids and the ropes. Thinking someone miissed the mats, he called 911. Gabby got the entire school, plus police & fire from our city seeing her acrobatics, twisting the rope around herself, holding on lower, she untwirled to the excitement of all. Then she zipped right back to the top.. They finally bribed her down with a lunchroom cookie! I told her teacher on day one, Gabby will climb to the top of the swing set & go across the bar & down the other side. I told the teacher to tell her to come down & no more climbing. The teacher said it was the first time it ever actually happened in all her years (5) of teaching.
Our son was also prenatally exposed to alcohol but it didn’t start showing till middle school. He has zero executive function. He’s small, for a boy whose parents were said to be 1.68 m (5’7”) and 1.9 m (6’ 2”), exactly our heights… hmmm Anyway Duncan is 5’5.5” tall now. Gabby is 4’11”.Duncan is 18 now & Gabby is 19.5 now. I’m fully versed in my own kids FAS journies. I can help others learn or give ideas.
If anyone is in the metro Detroit area, MCFARES.org has a Project SAFE meeting once every Wednesday night from 6-8, potluck & parent support. We have another one where there’s a gym for the kids. Second Saturday of every month, 5:30-8:30, also potluck. Parent support & kids play. I’m looking for any & all foster/adopt families with FAS/FASD kids.. there are the same 3 families with the same 5 kids & all are young adults. I’d love to get younger families in, so we can help. ❤️
Hi @woohoo, welcome to the About Kids & Teens group. Let's get you connected with others who have experience with children living with fetal alcohol syndrome, like @ljpettit @pricet @naenae01 and @irene5.
While we wait for others to join the conversation, can you tell us a bit more about you and your family. Having a 15 year old is tough period. But I can imagine you're wanting to talk with others about specific challenges related your 15 year old's FAS. What challenge are you dealing with at the moment that you would like to share?