← Return to Pacemaker recipients: Looking for support from others

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@joann2022

Thanks for sharing. I want to know any and everything that you will tell me. I very curious. I had a massive heartache when I was 32. My daughter at the time was only 16 month old. Needless to say my now ex husband put me through hell and back. A lot of emotional abuse due to my condition, after a few months of being in the hospital and going through cardiac rehab. I had to do a physical Agility test to get back on the streets. Couple years later I got the icd put in. I had 3 ablation 2 for v tach/ v fib and this one a couple weeks ago for a fib. The icd shocks are horrible it’s like I’m always waiting for the next one. I m so scared the anxiety is horrible.

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Replies to "Thanks for sharing. I want to know any and everything that you will tell me. I..."

Joann, I find it interesting we have a certain activity that brings on anxiety, but it is a bit interesting to me as I never had it go off while taking a shower but was worried that the water and a shock seemed to make it the worse situation. Being I worked around electricity all the time and occasionally would get a minor shock from devices I was working on I always was taught Electricity and water do not mix. Even before having a pacemaker, I never liked the feeling of wall voltage which is about 110 volts accidently touching it. But one day I got hit by 220 which thru me a few feet and made me the safest technician ever after that experience. But ever since that It made me much safer. So now I have a question does it feel different if your wet? For me, my fears were always sleeping and driving. I can really relate to your fears also. It the anxiety more than the shock I believe. It is actually a form of PTSD so at one point I did speak to a councilor to help with the fears. It helped me at the time to at least have someone to talk to about it. So, I have enjoyed try to help others thru connect and I really hope you can find some answerers to relieve the anxiety.
I mentioned the details of the transplant that made me feel God had my back. It was the combination of the period leading up to transplant that seemed preplanned by Him. I too went thru that incident in 2015 that got me to quit drinking. I never felt I over indulged, but it became that I had to have a beer every day after work that I realized it became an addition. But for some reason after that 2015 incident the desire to drink anymore was the furthers from my mind. At the time I was attending Church and was always concerned that someone would find out. I wanted to be more involved with teaching Sunday School and working with the Youth teens. So, it was decision time for me, and God gave me the push I needed. So, after that even though I went thru a few more years of declining health I knew it would get better. What I did not know at the time was that (and transplant was never discussed at this point) someday I was going to get a new heart and drinking, or smoking is a no go for transplant approval. Even quitting smoking was another twist of fate. that was in 2011 I too had a marriage breakup but mutually agreeable we still had kids together and get along OK. But my new wife I met in 2011 and even though She never mentioned the smoking years later she too would said no to marriage if I had not quit. But what got me to quit was I was in the Hospital after that first shock, I mentioned and had so much trouble getting back in bed after I went outside to have a smoke. My O2 when I got back to bed was like eighty. That is what convinced me how stupid I was. That was the last day I smoked and even throw away four packs of cigarettes. Again, God getting me ready for transplant as you will not be approved if you are not smoke free for at least a couple of years.
Fast forward to 2017 November and I was on the road with my Job and had a shock while at a remote area hotel some 3-hour drive from Home. Usually after the shock I feel a bit better, and I waited for about an hour to make sure I was not going to have a second one. for me usually they came in pairs. So here it is 2 AM and I decided to make the 3-hour drive home. What I found out later I had like six arrythmias that for some reason did not cause a shock. I got home and called my boss the next morning. Usually after a shock I would call my Cardiologist and download my device to have them read it and decide if I needed to be seen. It was at this point That my EP Cardiologist tried another ablation and felt it was not successful and we should consider a transplant evaluation. He said he wanted to just get the ball rolling on a possible option if needed for the future. Well, that is when I first even knew they transplanted hearts. He did want to try one more ablation this time from the front or outside of the heart but that one was not successful either. Well off to mayo Clinic for an evaluation. While going thru the process my heart was still have many arrythmias, so the Mayo EP Doctors tried one more ablation. Not a success and I mean Mayo never gives up on someone Hence the reason I cannot say enough good things about the Staff at the Mayo Clinic in Phoenix, Az. Well, they tried everything to try and find that bad path causing all the arrythmias. So now were into December and I am not leaving until they find either a solution for my heart or I get approved for a transplant. Well like I already mentioned I am convinced the Lord God had this all planned out. He had the perfect heart in mind and it something my son told me that convinced me that everything was leading up to the one I got. After the transplant what my son told me was the Surgeon said that the heart fit better than usual and it was like it was designed for your dad. all the arteries and veins lined up perfectly. Well, the rest is now history That was 4 years ago and as a bonus the one thing that can fail in a transplant is rejection by my body. I take anti-rejection meds to insure that does not happen, but it is not always successful. In the beginning they take samples of the new heart to check for rejection and all mine came back no rejection. So, I think I will stop for now, have a great day and try to stay positive. I hope my story helps to know that there are always options and I look forward to hearing what ideas you EP Doctor may have to help with your Arrythmias. Ill also add you to my prayers for some relief from the anxiety.
Blessings