@colleenyoung Thank you for asking me in to this conversation.

@karenmarian2 As others have mentioned, welcome to Mayo Clinic Connect. It's a difficult situation for you, seeing this is a long-distance relationship. I know his transplant team is his sole medical at this time, but he must have had a primary care doctor prior to transplant. Wonder what happened to them? Maybe he can ask them for a referral to a PCP if his old doctor is no longer in the picture.

Going gentle on your approach may get you answers without anger. By telling him you love him, letting him know that to understand his daily care will go a long ways in easing your mind. He probably would be care-compliant, or not, whether you were right there with him, or not. My husband is a kidney transplant recipient, and he is faithful about his medications [even saying he is grateful I remind him, most of the time!] but got into some less-than-stellar eating habits. It took a poor labwork result recently for him to understand he had to modify his ways. But I needed to let him make his own mind up, which was difficult for me.

Letting your boyfriend know and hopefully understand that you care deeply for him, and you want him around for a long, long time, he will understand the reasons you seem to "nag" him. Do you think he would feel less aggravated if he understood this? Any chance in the future you two would be in the same city?
Ginger