Ginger, my mother is dead. I do not know if it is the new year coming, or finding out that I may have diabetes, almost died of high blood pressure (220/140) and realizing that I did not want to die really. But Ginger I feel so lonely, in my neighborhood everyone has a family, those who do not have a family, are successful, so people want to be with them. I have been nasty, arrogant, and I am French -- No one else is French here in the circle where I live. I wish I could do it over, I wish people would forgive me when I ask to be forgiven, but the answer is always "I am not interested in talking with you, you should have thought about it before..." So this group is what I am hanging on to. Honestly, there is no one else.