Be Honest Your Loved ones are going through this with you Tell them Some Days are good and some are bad empathize but don't Sympathize.

@msg I can very much understand this dilemma. While I believe honestly is the best policy, I also think there could be another consideration at play here. Having to acknowledge and speak of your pain each morning could set you on a path of having that be a focus of your day rather than a topic that would be more encouraging and hopeful.

You will notice I did move your post into an existing conversation with members sharing your same sentiment, i.e. not wanting to complain about the pain. Members such as @dianrib @ursweetpam @jfsherley @lioness @parus may be able to share their thoughts as well.

As for how to approach this with your wife, one thing to consider is to have a basic understanding, by way of a blanket conversation perhaps, to share that you don't want to feel disingenuous by not being honest about the state of how you are feeling each morning but also don't want that admission to be one of the first affirmations of your day each day.

In all honesty, "how are you feeling" or "how did you sleep" is a pretty common way to start morning conversation after saying "good morning". Maybe the pair of you can come up with another thing you say to one another to move the conversation away from discussing your pain? Maybe you agree to ask one another "what is one thing you are looking forward to doing today?" to create a sense of hope and joy to start the day instead!

Do you think your wife would be receptive and do you think that would help your concern?