@pleasedontgo Have you checked out the Caregivers discussion group?
https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/meet-fellow-caregivers-introduce-yourself/
There are many wonderful, helpful people, especially @IndianaScott . Try the site, i know you’ll find lots of information!

Oh my dear, dear, Adell! First thing that entered my head when reading this message today was; You need to give yourself some credit for holding yourself together under this much pressure and having presence of mind to reach out to Connect! We’re all about support in our forum. Think of us as a table full of Aunties and friends! (Uncles too, though most of mine would just reply with a grunt or “what you need is a good…” then walk out the door. 😉 But we’re here to help in any way we can, sometimes just to lighten the burden off your shoulders by listening.

Adele, I had your phone number removed for your personal safety because this is a globally public forum. I understand your wanting to get a hospital bed for when Ricky returns home. Were you told he’d require one to be able to be at home? He may not need a special bed so I’d wait until you know. That way you can use the $100-150 for something more vital.
I like @becsbuddy idea of renting or contacting a senior center which loans out medical equipment for short time use.

Let’s put some focus on you. Ricky’s in the hospital being well attended at this point, but my girl, you are frazzled beyond the pale. I know you’re probably used to a division of labor between the two of you. It’s really hard to take on all that responsibility by yourself now and it’s pulling you under.

What can you do to gain some control over your life? It will take baby steps at first.
Financially, are there things draining money that you can offload?
If you have a truck do you need the car? You could get out from under that loan, leaving you with more money.

It sounds like you’re working full time and by the end of the day you’re back home trying to get everything else accomplished. What is sapping so much of your time and energy at home?
A suggestion is to sort through things that require your time. Write down in order of their importance. List the truly important tasks only! This is what I do when I’m feeling overwhelmed with ‘stuff’ in my head. I find actually writing down what I need to do, compresses that list and makes it all manageable. When I see certain things in writing, I realize they’re just not that important anymore.

Do you have any friends or family members who might be able to lend a hand with lawn mowing, helping around the house, etc? Just to get you back on track? Recovering from surgery on your foot has to be adding to the complications!

Try to get to bed by 10:30 -11:00 each night instead of 3 or 4 AM. That’s not sustainable. And often we get ourselves in a state of mind where we just can’t slow down or stop. Been there! But I will tell you, there is nothing more important than your health!!
So Adell, I mean this sincerely, slow down a little and breathe. My daughter, now 38, told me last year how much it meant to her growing up, when I’d grab the area above one or both of her wrists when she was worked up about something. It was meant to have a calming affect and apparently it did. So if I could, I’d reach through this computer this morning to hold you by the arms and calm you down. Take a deep breath and together we’re going to get you through this. You need to take care of you!

How is your foot healing now after the MRSA surgeries?