Hi Colleen, Sorry for the delayed reply and thank you for checking in. The last two weeks have been chaotic. When at the hospital to meet the transplant team to begin the interviews, my husband was in such bad shape, they immediately admitted him and began the physical evals. Within 2 days, the ICU roller coaster began. It was touch n go for several days. The team has worked tirelessly to get him stable, so they can complete the testing and formally submit his case. They all believe he will be approved despite the fact the addiction has not and is not being addressed. We live 125 miles away from the hospital he is in - which has made my visits more infrequent. He is adamant to come home; I am equally as adamant I can't care for him in this condition. It's a battle and he is angry and frustrated with me, thinking I am being unreasonable and selfish. I reached out to the transplant team today to ask them to slow the roll on the discharge. They were under the impression there is fulltime care here at home, which there is not. It's just me and with work, all the more challenging. The man is still on a feeding tube and catheter so I am puzzled as to why there is such urgency to release him. ? Pretty sure it's coming from my husband. Now I am wallowing in guilt - questioning if I did the right thing sending the brutally honest email - yet knowing I did. Fearing they will not approve him now; fearing they will. His pre-transplant care plan has now become a glaring issue for the transplant panel. I've been clear I cannot be the primary or secondary post-caregiver. Now I feel trapped that I have to be the pre-care provider. I am not heartless and want to do what is right ... but I am struggling more then ever. So very, very tired.