Oh, we can sure be our own worst enemies can’t we? The negative self-talk and self-loathing are exhausting. It’s easy to get stuck in ruts or habits that are so toxic to ourselves. I’ve been there… It took me getting to a really low point in life to decide to make permanent changes in my attitude. But I had to be willing to change before that could happen.
It is doable and takes a lot of practice until being positive becomes the new way of life.
The fact that you reached out to Connect shows me you’re wanting to make some changes in your life, am I guessing right?

You caught my attention with the energy drinks! How many do you have daily? I have to admit that for about 3 years, I’d have a can of Bing energy drink every afternoon. I never thought it was that big of a deal, it was a cherry health drink. LOL. Nope, never realized the super high caffeine in the fine print. So, I know exactly what you mean about helping you think! Boing!! Definitely sharpened my focus!!
But wow, there was a downside! If I was late having my afternoon fix, I’d get horrid headaches, mood swings, heart felt like it was skipping beats, jittery. This has me wondering about some of the symptoms you’re experiencing.
I’m not suggesting you quit but if you do, make sure you taper off incrementally. It’s painful going off cold turkey. But maybe consider cutting down on a little. Especially since it bothers your stomach. Energy drinks can also leave you dehydrated because they act as a diuretic. So try increasing your water intake to rehydrate!

What would happen if you changed up your routine a little? There’s nothing wrong with gaming and movies. I’m guilty of binge watching movies or TV series too, but I’m usually doing something else at the same time like sketch and painting, knitting, crossword puzzles, etc..
What if you took a walk before you sat down to start a movie or new level. In a game? They can become the reward for walking a half hour and you’ll feel less guilty! Do that enough and walking will become a daily habit.

Have you considered joining a gym? Sometimes that can be a real self-motivator to make some positive changes. Exercising and endorphins are huge in building up our health and good positive image.
I know you feel socially awkward about yourself but honestly, having a better mental image and being proactive will go a very long way in helping to get you out of this slump!

I found a couple sites that might be good exercises to jumpstart your mind in the right direction or at least give you something to consider.

– Stop Negative Thoughts Exercise:
https://anxietycontrolcenter.com/stop-negative-thoughts-exercise/
– 6 Tips to Change Negative Thinking:
https://www.verywellmind.com/how-to-change-negative-thinking-3024843
Can you tell me 2 things you like about yourself?