@anet Hi and this may be a bit uncomfortable since I'm a man and your issue is not only a woman's issue. I cant help with the medication issue and would leave that to his doctors but I can relate to a sexless marriage. I love my wife very much and similar to your issues(except yours is from you Husband) she feels uncomfortable during intercourse basically it hurts. Now I do feel left out as it seems when our intimacies stopped so did any touching even hand holding or kissing has disappeared. She like you husband seems uninterested in finding a solution. I personally think when I started having Health issues ( I have had a Heart Transplant) is when the other things declined. I see you mentioned Church and I am very dedicated to the Lord and ministry in general so I suspect for me that's a factor also. She does not attend church and so except for walking, shopping and dining out we don't have much else to share. So i hope at least this helps to know your not alone and Ill say your story helps me also.
I just myself try not to dwell on what we don't have and concentrate on what we do. I try to think that I did promise to Love in sickness and health and remember my vows. What if one of us had a serious accident and no longer had any body functions would that be a deal breaker? So I'm not much help, but for me knowing that the Lord knows my Prayers and as He told Paul about his thorn in the flesh "My Grace is sufficient" and remember someday we all will be in Heaven and enjoying a perfect Life that actually doesn't include physical sex but that the Joy we have is greater than what the this world has to offer by many times over .
I hope that at least gives some comfort and keep praying as the saying goes "But God" he can maybe change his outlook going forward in you Husbands drive.
Blessings
Dana

Anet and Dana, I think the loss of intimacy you're experiencing from your partners is not uncommon. Have either of you sought the help of a counsellor as a sexual health clinic or social worker? Sometimes it can help to talk with a professional even without your partner.

I understand what you’re saying. You are willing to live with his debilitating health issues but you don’t want to be pushed away or be in a loveless marriage. You are hurt and feel rejected from him distancing himself from you.

Men put to much stock on their lower head and can become very cold and indifferent when they cannot perform. When there’s no touching, cuddling and communication the marriage is built on a few minutes of pleasure and that is sadness especially when aging and sickness comes.

My husband always told me love must get past the bedroom. Aging train will not stop and sickness impacts the old and young. We’ve been married 32 years and dated beforehand 8 throughout our college years.

He was my first lover and I am from the old school thinking when he deflowered me he married me so I say we been married 40 years.

As we have aged we both have seen differences in our sex life. We joke about it and accept that the desire is there but sometimes the erection isn’t or vaginal lubrication isn’t there. At those times we look into each other’s eyes and say thank you lord we love each other past the bedroom.

When the desire is there but the body doesn’t cooperate (We) get out the bed and I fix an appetizer, he put on old school music and pop open a bottle of wine and we love, live and laugh. Play bingo or watch movies.

We live by his saying over the years,“Love must get past the bedroom.” It has been an aging and sickness game changer. But our faith in God is the glue that keeps us together in everything we face as we grow old together. Bless his name!

Talk to your husband and tell him how he’s making you feel. Don’t keep that inside as stress brings about disease and you need not get sick over his rejection.

Prayed to God on y’all behalf. Blessings and hugs to you dear heart ❤️