Unmanaged Pain

Hi Ivon, Just curious. Did this work well for you? I know the pain of stomach problems as I have unresponsive gerd.. Anxiety as well..

Several endoscopies. Some cell changes that they are watching. Stomach is not good but pain in the throat is horrible. Seeing ent next week. Seems the only time I get out is when I have a Dr's appt. So tired of Dr's and pills that are basically useless and cause too many side effects. Hoping if I calm down a bit things will be easier to handle. Be well.

@annie2 Oh I am the same in that the only time I go out now is for medical appointments. From raising children, working all my life and now a list of medical problems... the psychological toll of physical illness is something the medical doctors don't see and of course not there to deal with it... but is nice when we get a physician who acknowledges what we are going through; last week I had an ENT phone me after waiting months and months and he yelled at me for ten minutes saying he has a lot of patients with serious issues like cancer, operations etc. I wont go into detail but I have had cancer and operations.... but pain is pain and I waited my turn just to get a bit of help. Wishing you the best... I too have throat pain so every mouthful of food or even swallowing spit is a reminder! Take care. Lacy

So sorry you had to go through that. I can't tell you how angry I get with some of these arrogant doctors. They are not gods and do not know everything. If they did, we would not be in so much pain. Pain is a serious issue. It affects every part of our lives. Sadly, not all dr's have compassion. I say a prayer for all who go through this. Be well.

@annie2, @lacy2 Hello, Annie and Lacy.....After reading both your messages I decided I had to share with you some of my experiences with my own chronic pain, often unmanaged, and my son's pain from dystonia.

He's been in excruciating nerve pain for 17+ years with not one moment of pain freedom. He's had a dilaudid pump for the last several years. With that and botox shots he's surviving, but has horrid PTSD and is still in constant pain. He's finally getting emotional help, but it's far too long coming and he will probably never have the pain controlled.

I've had pain from osteoporosis since age 35, fibromyalgia age 35, sarcoid age 40, abdominal surgery for large benign tumor age 45, other issues along the way all seeming to cause pain. Now, I'm in constant and often serious pain from severe arthritis, especially in my feet, hands, wrists, lower back and cervical vert.

So, a lot of things for a lot of years have caused a lot of pain.

Today, I'm much better due the help of Mayo doctors I've seen for the last several years. I began with neurology after 12 years of misdiagnosis w/MS. I've received caring, kind, extremely thorough and knowledgeable care since the first visit. I haven't agreed with nor liked all the docs, but 95% have been wonderful to me and helped me beyond belief.

Today, thanks to this hard work with them and by me, I'm a much better and different person. No more bad docs! No more 'poor me'! I'm in charge of myself, not the doctor or nurse nor anyone other than me. I make the choices every day that determine how my day and the next day go. I choose to be emotionally well, healthy, or I choose to allow myself to feel sorry for myself. Sometimes, I give a day or two to have a pity party. Then, buck up and move ahead.....

When I work to be emotionally healthy, to be positive and reduce negative in my life, I feel better, I hurt less or don't notice or dwell on it.....I'm walking now, not a lot or a long way, but walking with my hot pink walker and stand straight and as tall as I can....it hurts and when it's too unpleasant, I slow down and/or stop. I don't go anywhere but Mayo, PT, PCP, drive-through for meds. Been that way for years since before Covid due to my own illnesses and pain levels.

No more soap-box, but ladies, so much of it is in our control. For real. Pray. Think good thoughts about yourself. About others. Be kind to yourself and others. Be a realistic 'Polyanna'! I do good things just for me just because I deserve good things!

Ck out @becsbuddy, Let's go for a walk....or @artscaping on Chronic Pain or Quality of life.... and the other angels who have lifted up so many. Connect has probably done more to help me in this walk than anything other than prayer! They've given me hope. You can have hope. Listen to what they've experienced. I've learned from them, about all this, treatments that work, new ideas.... Amazing how much all this has helped me. I've been helped and healed by this and by prayer....

So, enjoy this journey. This is it.....no do over, so now I'm making the most of each day, every person.
Blessings to you both and all who are hurting. Life is yucky sometimes! But, it's life and that's good....elizabeth

@ess77 Sorry you and your son have been through so much; and I admire you for, basically, what you have done to help yourself. It puts me to shame although years ago I did fight the good fight but circumstances now my get up and go got up and went. It's difficult for others to understand: my one daughter gets how I feel and my limitations; my other one feels I should make more effort..... and my husband is there for me as a rock but does not get into physical/mental health suggestions etc., plus he just had triple heart surgery and is a diabetic and has also had cancer. I truly wish I could be more like you but its impossible ... perhaps if I had beren fortunate enough to go to Mayo or a teaching hospital in Toronto but the doctors in this northern Ontario town except for a few are not really ---------, I started to travel to see specialist re glaucoma but when got c.diff and then fecal incontinence travel out of the question. Also, have few friends and within 2 years 4 died including my brother in UK. Year before Mum and nephew in UK..oculd not go to funerals.... .. so as well as depression , extreme sorrow. Thanks for your suggestions and will re-read and see if I can implement some, but so far have not achieves. Hugs.

.... just want to add ... is it true that, as well as the fact we all handle pain differently, that some actdually have less pain tolerance than others...... my spouse and I could have exactly the same thing yet he can "handle" the pain which I cannot.... I have always had a low pain tolerance and wonder if its different bodies; how we were raised; emotional connection? I also need verification of my suffering, not necessarily sypathy (sorry but true) yet he keeps quiet about it..... just curious.... J.

@lacy2 Hello, Lacy. I am indeed extremely fortunate I live in the area I can get to the Mayo Clinic Florida easily. I have 'easy access' to the expertise and care of these folks. I had quite a fight through the years it took to get me there, but I am so blessed and I know it every day. You have tough issues to face. Sometimes it is a lonely, uphill climb trying to keep above water, put that one foot in front of the other, but it can be done......one tiny, iddy, biddy step at a time, with lots of steps backwards.

I guess I realized I truly was better when the backward steps began being smaller and fewer, the steps toward acceptance of my physical situation.....and that's a really hard one, acceptance, 'cause we don't like or want to be where we are with our health! When I didn't want gray hair, I went back to the first choice and colored it black, smiled and felt good. I made a decision, I took control. Last year, I decided, made a choice to let it be it's natural self, gray. So, I accepted my age, my self as I am and felt so liberated. You know, that may have been my awakening to the reality of my life, the acceptance of life.

So, my friend, deep breath, please. Another deep breath. Now, move one foot forward, just a bit. You did it and still standing. Another deep breath......then rest...and begin again. That's it. You're on your way. 'Gotta remember to breath.

I remember years ago, I was told 'No one promised you a rose garden!'. Nope. They didn't, but I expected one and fought and screamed inside until I finally realized.....roses are so lovely, but they sure have thorns. Yep. We're feeling those nasty thorns. But, you're in control of yourself! Take that control, strip off those thorns and get moving!

Blessings, Lacy in every day and all you do. You are in charge of you....no one else. I think when this revelation began, I first realized I had that ability to live my life through my own choices. Wow, what a day.....elizabeth

...am very happy for you Elizabeth, notwithstanding I feel for your illnesses, J.

@lacy2 Oh, my have you hit on some important areas re pain and those pesky relationships.

I know we each have different mental, emotional, physiological reactions to pain of all types. For me, if I'm tired from staying up too late, like I did last night, the next day's pain may be tougher, either more or more difficult to handle. Seems logical. My choice had consequences. Took me a life-time to learn.

Also, I don't think we can ever compare one person's pain to another. Lacy, I have fibromyalgia. Medicine now knows this illness actually increases pain sensations, so even stumped toes are felt differently.

It's wonderful you found Mayo Connect. Here we meet folks who understand what we're feeling. They are or have been where we are and know, want to support us - Chris @artscaping or Sue @sueinmn or Ginger @gingerw or Becky @becsbuddy and so many others. They have helped me with all these issues, given me the support I never had or never felt I had.....they understand. Most important to me and my growth along this journey is this caring support. I hit a rough patch, shared and they were right there with me. I'll never forget that feeling. It was the beginning of my healing.

I'm not alone. NOT ALONE. Wow! That all by itself is healing.

Blessings. elizabeth