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Loving someone with a personality disorder
Mental Health | Last Active: Aug 2, 2012 | Replies (8)Comment receiving replies
Are you sure he didn't become uncomfortable when it seemed 'you' had a greater attachment to 'him' or the emotion you felt for him started to show...including showing your need for affection? Maybe the person he 'used to be' is still inside of him but maybe he changes when the relationship he 'perceives' himself to be in changes. Do you live together? I agree it would not be o.k. not to talk to you for weeks if you live together but if you don't then it would be normal 'to me'... I am not diagnosed but it appears I have avoidant traits, at the least...am female though. I have terminated every relationship instantly when the words love or marriage where so much as mentioned...even though I would prefer to be in one. On the other hand, I've known one man for over 20 years who never used words that implied commitment or defined relationships in those terms. Do you know how he was in past relationships? Seriously curious if you think he may perceive you to change first. I also wonder if he would withdraw less if you acted more casual...maybe a little indifferent, just not serious or too sincere. Just discovered APD & really don't know much about it. It appears a defining factor is that APD's do want a relationship & schizoid's do not at all.
Replies to "Are you sure he didn't become uncomfortable when it seemed 'you' had a greater attachment to..."
It seems you came into question here on this post. Just so you know, that was not the intention of the above comment. I actually admired the fact that you've had enough compassion and patience for the amount of effort it seems you have put into this relationship. The questions about how he reacts were genuine and I would still like to here your opinion on it.
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I used to know a woman that had some sort of 'borderline' personality. She would make friends and then sabotage the relationships with her meanness. She's never married and has trouble with commitments. We were good friends until she made some very mean remarks that seemed to be based in jealousy. Unfortunately, I couldn't handle the poison coming out of her mouth and had to end the relationship.