Sometimes it helps to distinguish between anxiety and depression which can be separate issues. I was not depressed because I knew I was on the right path, but I had anxiety living with other's issues. So I took a prescription at bedtime and slept it off and did well to succeed the next day. The doctor prescribed an anti-depressant which "souped me up" so much I couldn't stop working or sleep at night.
I soon stopped that and told the doctor he gave the prescription to the wrong person. I was able to stop the anxiety medicine in short order when the other person was gone from my life. My self respect was restored soon after and I am doing well in my old age. It is a difficult choice to try to live with personality problems that affect you or choose to stick it out to honor marriage vows or commitments.
At some point the choice needs to be made. I lasted 50 years in an unworkable, unloving marriage. I really don't recommend it, however.
If the other person refuses to acknowledge a serious problem or seek counseling, you must go alone, or you must change your residence.
We also need to not always accept blame for what others do that is hurtful. It destroys us. I am a whole, happy person now but it took a long time to get to this point. I try to help others but not be too interfering because solutions can be different for others. Dorisena