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fatherscaregiver (@fatherscaregiver)

Assisted Living and DNR (Do Not Resuscitate)

Caregivers | Last Active: Mar 24 3:31pm | Replies (62)

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@sueinmn, Thank you! I didn't want to say anything if it was just me overreacting. I really needed confirmation that she had over stepped her bounds before bringing it to the attention of the Administrator.

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Replies to "@sueinmn, Thank you! I didn't want to say anything if it was just me overreacting. I..."

If you follow any of the Discussions where I am active, you will see me say, over and over again, that we must be our own best advocates. That applies when we are caring for and/or assisting loved ones as well. I wish you good luck in your discussion, let us know how it goes!

Run, do not walk to the head administrator and tell them they have a dumb, stupid uncaring nurse that needs to be removed from caring for your dad.
She over stepped her boundaries.
Can you put him into another facility?

@fatherscaregiver, As the primary caregiver for my mom and sister for years, I used to laugh that I was the CEO, CFO and first line supervisor for a non-profit group of extended family. My mom and sister both had strong desires for "quality of life" vs "quantity of life". I had medical power of atty for both and made certain that all medical providers had copies of their DNR's. Many a time over the years, I had to intervene to assure they were receiving the best care possible.

Although mine was the reverse desire of your dad's desire for full code, I so agree with what @sueinmn responded. The nurse was totally out of line in her call and recommendation to you. I wouldn't blink before calling and reporting her to the administrator.

Thank goodness, your dad has you to stand up for him! It took far longer for me to learn to advocate for myself in questioning docs or treatments but whether for the ones in our care or for ourselves, we have every right to push for best care practices.

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