Celebrating the holidays differently. What gift can you give yourself?

I was a caregiver for 23 years and cared for three generations of family members. My husband died on Nov. 28th. I anticipated his death for years and planned consciously and unconsciously for it. My gift to me is a part-time job with the Open to Hope Foundation as Assistant Editor of http://www.opentohope.com
I accepted the job because I have the kind of mind that needs to be busy all the time. Working part-time fits my daily writing schedule and I am thrilled wit h the offer and the timing. Tis a gift I never expected.

I've been thinking of going back to work, but then, I am on disability and the stress is hard on me. I'm on SSDI. I am glad that you found a job that fits into your lifestyle and schedule. I have been on the go receintly and I'm finding that perhaps I really shouldn't work, so I get lonely not working. I became active in my church instead, and have made some new friends. But we are all loners, I think I'll call one today and see what she's up to with the holidays approaching. Covid has gone around this area, everyone is hibernating from the Covid bug, I think that has increased my stress and lonliness.

Covid increased my stress because I tested positive. Thankfully, I never developed any symptoms. Covid also changed how I honor my husband. No live memorial service at church. No hugs, No big gathering of family. Grief is lonely to begin with and Covid made it lonier.

I've had my first covid test recently, up the nose, it didn't hurt too badly. My test was negative, or it must have been, nobody notified me that I was positive anyway. What a weird new world that we live in with this Pandemic going on. Take good care of yourself. That's what I'm doing. And talking to one of these HomePod, it won't test positive for covid anyway! I just used it as a speakerphone. I'm wondering if I can Zoom for the holidays now, we zoom for bible studies. Our bible study leader, our pastor, on break for the holidays. I'll miss his Zoom sessions, has kept me from getting too lonely.

opentohope, I like that! we have a Blue Christmas service at my church, for those of us not having a happy happy holiday due to grief or loss. I maybe should go , or participate in your website, thank you!

@harriethodgson1 My sincere condolences on the passing of your husband. I know you were a dedicated caregiver, and have offered hard-won insights with us here on Mayo Connect. Your experiences give you a unique gift of relating to others.

Congratulations on the type of job you hoped for!
Ginger

Thank you Ginger. My husband was an amazing, humble man and I was blessed to be married to him for 63 years.

@harriethodgson1
Hello Harriet,
Please accept my condolences on the death of your husband. I know from your writings here on Connect and in your blog that you were a caregiver par excellence! Having had 63 years of marriage to "an amazing, humble man" is a wonderful legacy that he leaves behind. I can't imagine how difficult it must be to not have been surrounded by family and friends in the traditional way because of COVID. I will pray that your work will be fulfilling and that you will have peace in your heart and mind this Christmas season.

Thank you Teresa. I'm dreading Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, but will get through them. Sure wish I had family in town, but I don't.

@harriethodgson1 I hope that you will get lots of phone calls on those days so that you will feel closer to your family.