Maria, in my family, pain is an alien term. Most of my 6 siblings and my parents have never been very sick and none have ever dealt with any long term pain. They also don't relate to unhappiness. They only relate to keeping things light, don't be too serious, don't be deep. Most do not know how to show any sort of deep affection either. They act like they care, in a superficial way and will show concern, as long as you don't demand too much of their time listening to some tale of woe. It's a funny bunch. Not bad people at all, just no experience of much bad in their lives and not much interest in unhappy or uncomfortable topics. Unlike your siblings, mine do not drink much, or have any addictions per se.
My wife is probably the sickest most pain-ridden person connected to my family. They make sure to sound caring and I know they intend to show compassion, just not to the point of dwelling on it too long. Because of this I often find it difficult to relate to some people in my family. I still love all of them, but I just know not to expect too much of them or more than is realistic.
I tell you this just to convey to you that it is probably not that uncommon for someone with a lot of health issues to not receive much caring and compassion from within their family circle. It might be good to just accept them for what they are and for what they have to offer and leave it at that. The way it sounds, you probably will get more emotional support and understanding on Mayo Connect than you will from your siblings.
But if I am in any way missing the mark as it applies to you, please feel free to discount this as you see fit. Best to you, Hank