@lacy2
Hi, I have read your posts and I do not think you are talking too much. This is a place for you to express how you are feeling, and it takes the time and the words that it takes. I am sorry to know that you are relegated to the national health in Canada and waited ten months to see a psychiatrist. I have heard similar stories from people in other countries. My Norwegian friend (lives in Arizona) said his brother in Norway had to wait close to a year to get an important procedure done. Another lady here on Connect had some very choice words for the British health system. She was disgusted with it. I really hope the US does not end up like that but I fear it might.

I am sorry to hear that things are so bad for you and that you have a just-in-case "plan", by which you mean (correct me if I misunderstood) a leave-the-planet plan if things get unbearable. I hate to hear that, but I do understand. The pain (of all kinds) that some experience in life can seem completely unbearable and pointless. I have no answer to that for you, I just hope enough strength comes to you to bear through it. You have touched my heart and I hope good and joy come to you eventually. Best, Hank