What is Self-acceptance?
I have recently done some online search for these concepts but did not get any useful piece of information:
1. What is the difference between self-acceptance and self-reconciliation?
2. How to reach self-acceptance? Is it denying self-flaws, focusing on positive aspects and cultivating them, or facing my negative aspects and eliminating them?
I hope you can help me with them.
Thank you,
Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Depression & Anxiety Support Group.
@gailb- Growing up is so difficult! It's so unfair that we have to go through this, lol. I have spent years in therapy and kept thinking, if what she said is true why don't I think that other people see me as she does?
Most of us seem, at a certain time, as we age, to just accept what is and go from there!
@caroleeuits I am so proud of you! You said what self acceptance is and what it means. What kind of brain injury did you have? There are times I can't think right and feel confused, maybe being 68 is the answer. Also being in pain and being on Tymlos can do it too. I'm on Tymlos to increase my bone mass. I loved what you said and it makes me be more accepting of myself.
@gailb, You have read On Becoming a Person? Wow, I am a total Rogerian. He just got it right, especially Client Centered Therapy. Thanks.... I am excited. Chris
@artscaping Yes, I've read it and anything else I could find by Carl Rogers at the time. I LOVED his approach to counseling. His work helped me more than anything I've done. Now I think I have to get that book and read it again!
Hello @caroleeuits and welcome to Mayo Connect! I see that this is your first post on Connect and what a great picture!
It sounds as if you have developed some healthy thinking and that your traumatic brain injuries have not stopped you from developing a healthy sense of yourself. You've had a remarkable journey and I'm so glad that you are sharing yourself here on Connect!
Could you share with Connect, as you are comfortable doing so, what you have done to develop this strong sense of self?
@caroleeuits- Good morning and welcome to Mayo Clinic Connect. You are a brave lady who has also learned how to make the most of your incredible journey. You are correct in distinguishing between acceptance and appreciation for oneself. Appreciation happens before acceptance because you have to know who you are (knowing your full worth, good and bad) before you can accept it! Boy was this a tough one for me. Self-worth is placing a value on yourself- are you a good person? Are you a bad person? Self-esteem is based on comparing yourself to others, do you feel inferior or superior. These are all factors that we need to include in our maturing years of hopefully accepting ourselves. Through all of my years, I have learned that this is my journey and I can continue in self-loathing and depression and anger or have a hell of a time with myself. What gifts have come about after your traumatic brain injury?
@guener- I agree, learning to do all of these things is exhausting! I learned to relax more with not re-living the past or conjuring up something embarrassing by doing things, or simply put, by being present. You said a few days ago that, " I am physically and mentally experiencing changes that alter my health for the worse." It hink that these have been the norm for most people due to COVID-19.
What specifically has gotten worse for you?
@gailb, @artscape- Good morning. What brave, and caring people you are. I find it easier to admit, accept, and change my shortcomings and then to fully divulge them to others on Connect, don't you?! I'm not a big reader on self-help books. Can you, or do you actually change after reading this type of book?
@merpreb You make an interesting point. Self-help books, listening to speakers, going to therapy, etc. do not actually change us. They do, however, plant the seeds of knowledge and insight into our minds and lives. Whenever I read a self-help book or hear someone speak on the topic, I feel that the "seed" of insight and knowledge is planted somewhere in my consciousness. As planting a seed does not make it grow overnight so these seeds of change will take a while. The more that is planted in our mind the more opportunities we have for change.
Change does not happen quickly (as we would hope). We have to remember that it took us a while to become unhealthy therefore the process of becoming healthier will take some time as well.
@caroleeuits, Welcome to Mayo Clinic Connect but more importantly -- Thank you so much for sharing such a great post. I especially appreciate your artwork and what self acceptance means to you.