Lori, Unfortunately there is no easy answer for your question. I support you reaching out. At times, you are certainly suffer at a significant level, and at the same time trying to continue your support for the man you love, after going through one of life's most difficult challenges.
You can't continue to provide the level of support you desire unless you care for yourself first. If necessary, talk to a professional in order to enable you to continue in a positive, and healthful manner.. You can not change the direction, only to ease the journey.
Acceptance is not necessarily a bad thing; it is what follows that matters at this moment. Encouraging him to recognize you, and any other loved ones support, and especially to take whatever pleasure is available on a daily basis, without appearing to make demands, is a key to a somewhat serene future for both you and him. He must choose that as well.
Best.