Age 65 and Good Health: Can I get my own groceries?

I wish my husband would help me clean. He plays on the computer, watches TV, and takes a nap every day! It's a good thing he and I have separate TV's. He likes loud, scary, fighting movies. I like Christian movies and love stories. I loved "Little Women" and things of that nature. No fighting! No guns! I like cleanliness and wish I could scrub everything from top to bottom. I need back surgery (which I do not plan on getting). God bless you all.

Cook meals for your self, if you are the cook.
When he helps with the house cleaning resume cooking for him.

@woogie- Oh, dear. Funny thing is I love the kind of movies that you both like! Have you talked to your husband about this? Can either of you walk outside? If so take a walk together and tell him how you feel. It's not easy, is it?

Staying home as much as possible, but will want to visit a daughter that just had surgery.
She is recovering at a rented house close to Mayo Clinic. Her husband is cooking and taking care of her. We want to take groceries to them.

@merpreb
I m sure a lot of people can relate to that. Everyone needs periods of alone time. But it’s better than being so isolated there is no one else around. Can you take mini vacations from each other ? One or the other go for a walk alone or set a time to be in separate rooms for a hour, for example. Would he be offended if you suggested it. How about you set a date time. Whoever cooks sends the other person away to another room to decide what movie you will watch . Someone can be the water and set the table . Then have a nice sit down dinner. Let the person who didn’t cook clean up the kitchen. Then one of you disappears into the other room to relax and come back when the movie starts. Sounds silly but people can get inventive when push comes to shove.
Remember when we needed breaks from having very young children at home? Same thing.

Not that this applies to you but I wonder if we will see an uptick of domestic violence is already volatile homes.

FL Mary

@imallears- After close to 40 years I have it down pat. But we still do have to live together! He's outside right now. I'm having my break :)))

@woogie
He will not change his habits unless you take the first steps and make some drastic changes. As @mcryan said, cook for yourself and then go read a book. Don’t do his laundry. Demand your time on the computer. Different tv tastes is not the problem. This will be harder for you as you will have to overcome the urge to clean everything. He’ll notice eventually. You are stressing yourself out...he isn’t. The virus situation is only exacerbating the situation. You know him best but stop enabling him and remain calm and matter of fact when he finally realizes. Then decide the time for a talk. Don’t be an Edith to his Archie....tough love baby. Do this for yourself. Not easy for you.

FL Mary

Thank you. Great article.

@mcryan I just had my groceries delivered and what I do is take a Lysol wipe and use it on everything before I put them away . Im 78 and cant get out we are on a lockdown now so this is my suggestion

Thank you,