As the wife of a kidney transplantee (11/13, almost a decade ago), one really important thing is for you to take a big breath...and relax! At first, you're given frightening instructions, a strong message that you're responsible for this precious gift, and the need to live very carefully. While that's true until your son has had his new heart long enough to be on the correct amount of immunosuppresants, you may be surprised at how soon he (and you and those around you) may be able to live normal lives. It may seem, when he first leaves the hospital and needs to have labs every second day, then every third day, etc., that you'll always be tethered to his transplant team. However, you'll find that normal life doesn't take that long to return, and that, except for all the meds he'll always take, things will settle down so that your lives will become downright ordinary.

My husband is a brittle diabetic, 66 when he received the new kidney, so his post-transplant outlook was more problematic than many--but it turned out that he simply breezed through the rather brief period of intense testing, checking, wearing a mask, etc. Part of the ability of transplant recipients to rebound today is that experience has made it possible for doctors to fine-tune the correct amount of immunosuppresants pretty quickly. My husband only had one small change in dosage shortly after transplant, plus one other one a couple of years later. Given that most recipients will be far healthier post-transplant, the fact that they start out with very close to the perfect dosage means a much swifter return to life, a life that's better than it had been!

Also, some of the immunosuppresants actually have some anti-viral properties! Our transplant center doesn't believe that their post-transplant patients are at great risk, nor have they been told to take any special precautions. The one thing that you will learn is to always wash your hands carefully, and carry a hand sanitizer in your vehicle(s) for times that you decide to have a meal away from home. We were horrified when, only two weeks post-transplant, my ex-husband showed up at my daughter's for our Thanksgiving dinner...with his usual winter cold and hacking cough. In spite of all of our fears, no one present caught his nasty cold. So, again, take a deep breath and relax...life is only going to get better.

Hi Brendan White @brenwhite I saw your post and wanted to introduce myself. I would like to congratulate you on your son's recent Transplant and offer to answer any questions you have. I too was a Heart transplant recipient on Jan 5 2018. Now 2 years later I'm doing well. So please let me know how I may help during the upcoming days and months. May you have a blessed day.
Dana

Hi @brenwhite, I'd like to add my welcome to Mayo Clinic Connect. Health care providers and families are making very difficult choices. You must be so grateful that the decision was made for the heart transplant for your son. Allow me to introduce you to fellow heart transplant recipients and caregivers, like @danab @estrada53 @gbcapecod @glinda @lupedelarosa12, @fatherscaregiver, @amynewheart, @eileenheart and @linda59.

In addition to @joyces thoughts about life after transplant, you may enjoy reading these tips from fellow transplant recipients.
- Living Life after your Transplant https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/living-life-after-your-transplant/

Are you able to video chat with your son in ICU or only his team?

Dear Breandan, I sending you and your son cyber hugs and best wishes as make this very difficult journey together through chat.

@brenwhite, I want to add my welcome to you and I congratulate your son, you, and the transplant team for this transplant during these most difficult of times. I want to commend you for your positive attitude and trust in the care that your son is receiving at Mayo. Mayo is where I had my transplant 11 years ago (liver and kidney) and I assure you that your son is is the best possible care. I know that you will be overjoyed when he is able to safely come home. I am happy that you are adjusting to living like a transplant recipient, because that makes you one of us! Sending prayers as recovery continues.

Hi @brenwhite These are such difficult times to have a loved one in the hospital and be cut off from visiting. Congratulations to him and to you on his transplant. I am a liver transplant recipient.
Hopefully, his time in the hospital will not be much longer and he can be home with you soon. In the meantime, we are so fortunate to live in an age when we can communicate electronically.
Your attitude is admirable, considering yourself to be a transplant recipient so you can adjust to his needs and requirements. Overall, it's not really that bad, primarily some restrictions due to immunosuppressants.
JK