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mattrix169 (@mattrix169)

Antisocial Personality Disorder

Mental Health | Last Active: Mar 29, 2020 | Replies (21)

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@lisalucier

Hi, @mattrix169 – I agree with you — I don't care for people telling me to relax or to calm down. It just doesn't help and is pretty offputting.

We don't actually give advice here on Mayo Clinic Connect, as we are not medical professionals. Rather, the goal in this online community is to connect patients with other patients, who help and support each other tremendously.

I really commend you, as you seem very self-aware and are clearly trying to improve things in your life.

Hoping that @gingerw will return to the discussion and that @mlbaier @lighthouseceliac @parus will have some input on how to tone down your unstable anger. @jenniferhunter and @anncgrl have talked about dealing with explosive anger/rage with a loved one and may have some suggestions for you.

How is the relationship with your brother after the fight you mentioned?

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Replies to "Hi, @mattrix169 - I agree with you -- I don't care for people telling me to..."

@lisalucier Now, I am only speaking for myself. I can't respond from others' shoes since I haven't walked in them. But it seems to me those who claim they would be "okay" with being told to calm down or relax are just lying to themselves. So @mattrix169 my response to your anger issues and feeling like you are being attacked is, "congratulations that you recognize this in yourself and that you are trying to figure out how to have less dramatic responses reactions". I know for me, being able to see that I am triggered by something shows in sight. When you know where do these things come from you can start working on how to minimize them. For me, being told all the time I am too serious, too unsmiling, ect. meant I had to distance myself from those people. Those same people used to really trigger negative emotions in me and finally they had to be out of my life for me to try to survive.
Is it easy? Heck no. Is it rewarding if you manage to have some success, regardless of the method you do to get that success? Oh yes it is! I hope that you will continue to check in, let us know how you are doing and let us know how we can help you.
Ginger

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