Antisocial Personality Disorder

Posted by mattrix169 @mattrix169, Jan 27, 2020

Hi anyone who reads this I am a person who has Antisocial personality disorder and struggle with it because of the severe nature of this disorder it makes it hard to want to talk about as most people aren't sure really how it really works it is not being isolated it is being highly active against society and particular to violating the norms of society and it leading to grounds of arrest I am still learning more about my disorder and how it effects people in general if anyone has more adivse about this disorder that would be great I have studied the icd 10 and the dsm's up to current which was what was used to digasnois me

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Hi, @mattrix169 - Good to hear from you. I also wanted to introduce you to another Connect member, @jimhd.

And, yes, I was talking about the same thing as you are ... about seeing a counselor.

I've seen a counselor during different periods of my life (e.g., my parents' divorce, breaking off an engagement to be married), and as long as you see a good one who feels like a fit for you, I've found them extraordinarily valuable. Have you found counseling helpful for you?

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HI @lisalucier I did send @jimhd an message just have been kinda busy so havent checked and Ive been in counceling for almost 3 yrs now and seeing a psychatrist on and off for many years but it just seems that when i get one step ahead i go 100 back

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Hi @lisalucier I was wondering if you might have some advise on keeping my unstable anger toned down from full blown rage which i just came down from about 2 days ago I snapped pretty bad got into a fight with my brother dot regret it or have any remorse seeing as he provoked the situation but I dont think I should have to be told to relax or calm down.

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@mattrix169

Hi @lisalucier I was wondering if you might have some advise on keeping my unstable anger toned down from full blown rage which i just came down from about 2 days ago I snapped pretty bad got into a fight with my brother dot regret it or have any remorse seeing as he provoked the situation but I dont think I should have to be told to relax or calm down.

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Hi, @mattrix169 - I agree with you -- I don't care for people telling me to relax or to calm down. It just doesn't help and is pretty offputting.

We don't actually give advice here on Mayo Clinic Connect, as we are not medical professionals. Rather, the goal in this online community is to connect patients with other patients, who help and support each other tremendously.

I really commend you, as you seem very self-aware and are clearly trying to improve things in your life.

Hoping that @gingerw will return to the discussion and that @mlbaier @lighthouseceliac @parus will have some input on how to tone down your unstable anger. @jenniferhunter and @anncgrl have talked about dealing with explosive anger/rage with a loved one and may have some suggestions for you.

How is the relationship with your brother after the fight you mentioned?

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@lisalucier it is not in the best place but Im trying to make him understand that i am very prone to violent attacks or being aggressive when told to relax I told my mom to remind him that those phrases will send me into a rage but i will keep you posted on how things are going

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@gingerw

@mattrix169 Welcome to Mayo Connect. We're glad to see you here. We are fellow patients, caregivers and family member's offering support and sharing our experiences to help others in their journeys. We cannot offer medical advice nor diagnose conditions.

Here is a link to what Mayo Clinic has to say about your newly diagnosed condition. Would you like to share what made you decide to seek out help, and what you would like to see your future holding for you?

https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/antisocial-personality-disorder/symptoms-causes/syc-20353928
Ginger

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@gingerw I read the article on the aspd that you provided and the reason Im getting help is because I have antisocial personality with borderline and pyschopathic traits It was ordered by the hospital that I go into councelling and see a psychatrist because they consider me a threat so Im currently on medication and seeing a dr

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@lisalucier

Hi, @mattrix169 - I agree with you -- I don't care for people telling me to relax or to calm down. It just doesn't help and is pretty offputting.

We don't actually give advice here on Mayo Clinic Connect, as we are not medical professionals. Rather, the goal in this online community is to connect patients with other patients, who help and support each other tremendously.

I really commend you, as you seem very self-aware and are clearly trying to improve things in your life.

Hoping that @gingerw will return to the discussion and that @mlbaier @lighthouseceliac @parus will have some input on how to tone down your unstable anger. @jenniferhunter and @anncgrl have talked about dealing with explosive anger/rage with a loved one and may have some suggestions for you.

How is the relationship with your brother after the fight you mentioned?

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@lisalucier Now, I am only speaking for myself. I can't respond from others' shoes since I haven't walked in them. But it seems to me those who claim they would be "okay" with being told to calm down or relax are just lying to themselves. So @mattrix169 my response to your anger issues and feeling like you are being attacked is, "congratulations that you recognize this in yourself and that you are trying to figure out how to have less dramatic responses reactions". I know for me, being able to see that I am triggered by something shows in sight. When you know where do these things come from you can start working on how to minimize them. For me, being told all the time I am too serious, too unsmiling, ect. meant I had to distance myself from those people. Those same people used to really trigger negative emotions in me and finally they had to be out of my life for me to try to survive.
Is it easy? Heck no. Is it rewarding if you manage to have some success, regardless of the method you do to get that success? Oh yes it is! I hope that you will continue to check in, let us know how you are doing and let us know how we can help you.
Ginger

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@mattrix169

Hi @lisalucier I was wondering if you might have some advise on keeping my unstable anger toned down from full blown rage which i just came down from about 2 days ago I snapped pretty bad got into a fight with my brother dot regret it or have any remorse seeing as he provoked the situation but I dont think I should have to be told to relax or calm down.

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Hi!! These are trying times to say the least!!
I grew up with a sister who was always angry. As I got older I understand why, but at the time it was very hard to deal with. I had such emotions about how my childhood was, that I got together on skype with a hypnotherapist. Now you can find audio sessions for free, google home is what I use.
Hypnotherapy teaches you how to deal with life, and the great news that your own behavior is the only thing that you can control. Once you learn and practice this, it helps to realize that no matter what happens around you, that you have control over your own emotions and reactions.
Weeding out the ones who don’t help you in this effort can be tricky, working with a therapist of any kind can help with that. Mine said to let past relationships be...don’t kick up the dust...surround yourself with the things and people who bring you joy and peace.
Good luck....life lived calmer can be achieved!!

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It took me awhile to think of what I could offer. I have a number of friends and a family member who are driven by a variety of disorders that are incredibly difficult for them and for their family members. I spent many years in therapy myself. Difficult years and well worth all of them. I'm sober and clean for 35 years. It has taken all of this and failure after failure for me to learn one simple thing. When my son rages and he rages often we both are better served if I will allow him to exhaust himself and his rage without comment or reaction. Often we can talk with some degree of reason at that point. Our relationship is not an easy one. He had a closed head injury which created issues causing rage and he has explosive rage with a personality disorder. I love him more than I love my life yet it requires a great deal of energy and desire to be in his life. I fully believe long term therapy and an appropriate medication would improve his life dramatically. Like so many of us he cannot accept that option. This is a long post. Disorders require long and exhaustive therapy if a change is to be gained. I cannot imagine having rage that consumes me. I admire every effort anyone spends trying to manage it. Suggestions I have offered my son: walk away when he feels the first hint of rage, exercise to exhaustion when he feels rage controlling him, get outside help, feel free to delete this post if it is not helpful. I am officially sheltering in place close to the coast of North Carolina. Stay well, friends.

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@anncgrl I understand the rage aspect very well seeing as i go through it at least once or twice a week I have a friend in Toronto Canada I talk to and he helps me make sense of things such as saying there is no reason to be that way it will only raise your blood pressure I try to explain to him that it can come out of no where and for no reason Im glad that this site exists to at least help and advise hope you have a great day

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