She is not avoiding helping herself, it just looks that way. Let her know you love her and that you see how scary her world has become for her. She is afraid and the world isn't making sense anymore. I hope she is in a safe situation with loving caregivers who can take the time to coax her into taking the meds and using the HAs. You're such an amazing daughter, you care so deeply. Breathe through the hard moments, celebrate the decent moments and take good care of yourself.