Well, if a person with OCPD doesn't want to get better, or is in denial, you have two choices: live with him and avoid him, or leave, depending on your financial position. My sister's husband has a family history, along with his children and grandchildren, some who are medicated, and others who do not attempt to get better. My late husband was undiagnosed, but his OCD was evident and he died at a young age 71. He lived in denial for fifty years of marriage. There were other serious problems as well. My brother-in-law went to the University hospital doctor and then gave up and literally drove his wife insane with his disorder. His daughters are alcoholics and very compulsive. At this point you can only be kind and don't blow up at his rages, and you can just leave the room, as I did.
Yes, I had a bag packed as well, but I always came home at night because I knew he "owned me." God has blessed me with a very peaceful life and I don't allow any person to use controlling behavior with me. I have dumped friends, ignored relatives, and left churches because I want to be free of the conditions of OCD. It often declines into dementia and you can look forward to continued misery. I have known two success stories, with medication and behavior therapy which needs to continue for years. Love will not win the war over this disease if it continues into adulthood from childhood without medication.
It probably was a decision of the Mayo Clinic that they could not help him at this point. However, I have read literature from Mayo that they believe Narcissism can be cured or controlled with therapy, and after many years of study and being in a support group, I decline to agree. We are talking co-morbidity here. Dorisena