Thank you Jim. You are right. Their father could have seen and visited with them but I would have wanted supervised visits. It never came to that because he wanted his way, with no responsibilities for his children and to never see them again which was his choice. Another way to hurt the children. If they knew he really did not care to see them that knowledge would harm them even more. Seems I am damned if I do and damned if I don't. I want them to know the truth but how much will it hurt them? My son is very fragile with the nineteen some operations and other clinical work that was a must to rehabilitate him. But he is responsible and does hold a job. I did a good job holding it all together with no help. I am sure I have made many mistakes but I am proud of myself and do know that I have done a good job for all of us. I think my adult children should be put in their place and doing this by their knowing the entire history of this family. They are in their late fifties and should be grown-ups by now.