I think people, us , who are challenged by a cancer, develop a tolerance to adversity. At first there is the panic that shields and is a defense mechanism. You work through the panic then your life, your new life, begins. That is how I see it. The person I once was has changed. Priorities shift or change altogether. I am getting to know the “new” me. This is the “journey”. I met a man and he asked me out for coffee and my response was:”I will ask her(me) if she wants to go”. I am that disconnected from the new “me” right now. I see this as dealing with the adversity, the challenge, the cancer. I am a work in progress. I am in protective mode. Whether this is wrong or right who knows. I just know that for me right now I need to get to know the changed “me”. I take things in steps. I live one day at a time. I am most annoyed right now with the frivolous and most touched by the simple things. The sun coming up each day is beautiful and calming. I listen to birds and that is wonderful. My dog is a great comfort. He seems to know when I need him more. A hug from a friend feeds my soul! A smile from a stranger acknowledges me and I like that. I read posts on this site and it is nourishing. It satisfies my need for affirmation. I feel validated. Happy anniversary to you! You are still here and that is a very good thing. You are a survivor! Thank you so very much for sharing.